Talk Thursday - Progressions

Life is weird sometimes. Well, if you're me, it's weird all the time, but that's another story for another Talk Thursday.

One of the reasons I didn't write over the summer is I was just working through stuff. I keep thinking "You're in your 40's, you're supposed to have this all figured out." But I don't, and I keep working at it. I've been frustrated because I don't have a job I love. I love where I live, and when we moved back I remember telling TH "I can hate my job or I can hate where I live, but I can't hate both, I'll never make it." In some ways this is true. I couldn't. But I find disliking one or the other very disheartening. Don Quixote, quit tilting at windmills.

I've been trying to find paths in which I can feel fulfilled in different ways at my output, even if it's not output I get paid for. That's a bit challenging given that I do have a job, a family and I'm trying to get a professional certification that's good for the resume if not much else.

Today a few weird things happened. Two of them positive, one not in a way but a way that made me thoughtful. Today was truly a progression for me, and that's not an experience I've had in a while.

First, when I got to work, I had a message from @wallypingel on Twitter asking me if I'd be interested in providing a female sports/Packers perspective to his blog, PocketDoppler.com. I "met" Wally through CheeseheadTV and he has some people he collaborates on this site, which definitely has content of interest to me. I thought for a couple of hours - I love to write, I've been told I'm good at it professionally but for entertainment? Whew. But, I was thinking yesterday that I would love to do something like be a professional sportswriter, or a blogger that became financially solvent for it. Aaron Nagler from CheeseheadTv was featured in the New York Times yesterday along with his partner in crime Corey Behnke. They don't do this for a living. YET. But I think they might pull it off. I don't think I ever would but I thought - what the hell? So I'm going to have a weekly post for Wally unless he thinks I suck at writing. In which case you will never hear another mention of this again.

Second - had a great lunch with the colleague who's daughter is attending school with Big Bit and we found out that we had much in common - we both love Craig Ferguson, we both have surreptitious piles of "important" papers on various counter corners in our house, our college freshmen both break our hearts occasionally - you name it. The progression part though is that she had a project that she needed help with that was up my alley - how our company could use social media. I jumped at the chance because whether it results in advancement or not, I knew I would enjoy it and it IS professionally related output. Yay!

The last thing was sad in a way, and yes, in a minor way, but still. Greg Bedard from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, my Twitter buddy that came to see TH and I in Seattle, is leaving Wisconsin and moving to work for the Boston Globe as their premier NFL writer. Very cool for Greg, he's from the region and loves the Red Sox, but I was momentarily crushed, because he and I chatter about things every so often that are much beyond the Packers. Real Housewives of... (he and his wife love it, I DO NOT get it at all), last night we chatted about the Rutgers student's suicide because Greg went to Rutgers and I knew he'd be crushed, and other things now and again. Then I stopped and thought - you know, if I have any kind of connection in reality here to this very nice man, it's not going to stop because he leaves Wisconsin. Not like he lives next door to me in Boise, after all. And if we don't keep chattering, I know it was part of his professional obligation to talk to fans but he did it like a gentleman and that in this day and age is refreshing.

So - some new things for me to do, to think about, to write about and hopefully they'll result in some personal growth and accentuate the good things that seem to be brewing or already exist in my life. Start being appreciative, damn it. (I remind myself.)

Be Careful What You Wish For

Well, the good news is I probably won't be asked to move. That makes me very happy.

The bad news? We got the news that certain programs I am associated with are going out to bid. Without really any forewarning or consulting with any of us. The person who should have called to discuss this didn't- who is a much higher authority than any I work with, in Boise period - had their consultant do that. I will not say what I would like to call these people but it isn't pleasant.

The meaning of all this? Well, let's just say ultimately I'm not thinking it's job security for me and those I work with. In the short-term I think things are fine. Not sure long-term and I like to have people treat me and mine with the respect all humans deserve. Even Brett Favre.

I'm not sorry we left Utah. I'm really not. And while it's been a hard adjustment work-wise, I am starting to appreciate the people I work with for what they bring to the table. I just would like to have a job - even a "job" that would have your ordinary amount of politics, stress and heartache instead of doubt, fear and some loathing. I used to have it, so I know it's possible.

Sigh. Guess it's back to the salt mines.

And I have to come up with a Talk Thursday topic. I warn you, it may be a depressing one.

The Whole Social Networking Thing

So, I deactivated my Facebook account tonight. I did it because a high school boyfriend went from being cute to being a jerk, then a teacher from high school was defending himself against his role in the infamous Jackson Hole High School ski trip in 1982...and trust me, I know the truth on this one as opposed to his version...and I just got tired of people finding me on Facebook. If you've already found me, you no doubt have my e-mail.

Dilemma...or, I've done it to myself again

I started Facebooking a couple of weeks ago (as most of you know, since most of you are my family and you're about the only people who speak to me. Kidding.)

I've connected with Cele there as well as here, and family, some friends from the old Mothership as well as my beloved niece (well, The Husband's niece but I claim her too), who due to some rather undefined family strains (not between her and us) we haven't seen in a couple of years and have only talked to on the phone a couple of times.



And now, the dilemma. Someone's found me through Facebook. It's someone who at another time in my life I'd have be delighted to accept as a friend, if our situation and relationship was as I would imagine it would be. This person isn't family, in the sense that we're blood related and it isn't any of YOU, because you're reading this blog so I've had a relationship with you in some way or another (even if it's only via Internet). This person has made it clear we're certainly not friends, in a really passive aggressive way, for a lot of years now but due to circumstances we had to be in the same place at the same time for years but not lately.

It may open up my true opinion on some things to this person and then I might get TH in trouble with his family because I might reveal how he feels about certain things that he would share with this person if he felt so inclined. But he doesn't. And it's not my place to share it with anyone (other than I do vent to my sainted mother).

So, I guess I'm going to accept this person as a friend, be myself and see what happens. Maybe, ultimately, some fences will be mended. My opinions may creep out. If it does, I'm ready to stand by my right to have opinions. In this respect, I have nothing to be but myself.

If you're on Facebook with me and you figure out who I'm writing about, please keep it off that forum. The person in question obviously does not read my blog.

Rant over.

It's a Good Monday

It is a good Monday. I don't have to work. I should be doing something productive or fun. But I have a total lack of motivation.

I don't know if it's because I got a lot done over the weekend (which I did) or the fact that it's 30 degrees and cold as heck out, but I just want to sit with a book in a chair, read and do nothing.

That isn't an option, Little Bit is on Spring Break and so it would be rather mean to make him do nothing all day but watch TV or play XBox. Not that he would object, of course, but that really isn't what he should be doing.

Well, off to figure out something to do after lunch - I'll ignore that stack of library books that keeps calling my name from the comfy loveseat downstairs.

It's a Tagamet Day

Back in the day in Nevada, I had a nervous stomach (thanks, Grandma and probably a certain Uncle who has had stomach issues). It would pop up whenever my stress was OVER and the happy thoughts began. Nice stomach cramps...since my stress was gone and couldn't keep them from starting. As directed by a doctor many years ago, I take this wonderful drug, Tagamet, which is now available over the counter. I needed it yesterday. And today.

See, here's the things that caused it, in order:

• Dad's doing great and should be out of the hospital Tuesday. He looks great now and is talking well and is up and around.
• I've got a job that I think I will really like in the town I most like in the world
• We have a plan of attack for how to approach moving and where to live.
• We found a house in the interwebs that's in the perfect neighborhood, good price and great garden/backyard area - if only they will take a contingent sale.
• My pastor and friends at church looked way mournful when I said we were moving. It must be really crappy to have people be sad you will be going away.

This, obviously, must be enough to cause stomach cramps. Reesh.

If you haven't already figured out I'm neurotic, you have now. And no, it's not just the maternal genetics that cause this, because the paternal genetics have big control freak genes. And you all that share these genes know it, whether you admit it or not.

Have a good week.

FOUND IN IDAHO

I. GOT. THE. JOB.

WOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!!!

Sunday Wrap-Up

A couple of posts ago, I said that I hoped the Packers would welcome Brett with open arms if he came into camp and it was my blog so I could say so. Oddly enough, that seems to be happening.
Go Pack. And, I may get to see this very scene again, as I did last December:



We met some people through the blogosphere Friday - "Mr. and Mrs. S" - they are funny and entertaining to talk with). Looking forward to being able to get together again soon to discuss gaming, brewing beer and the oddity that is living in Utah. Among other topics...

Little Bit did his final requirement for getting his Bear badge for Scouts. Now, it's on to deciding if he should go on to Webelos (and yes, still leaning towards a different Pack to eliminate the minority issue), or him staying in the Ward - and I'm getting tired of getting hit up on Fast Offering Sundays because our name is on the list - can they please mark us as "Heathen"? - or if he's ready to quit. But he's done a great job and will look cool in his Cub uniform with his additional Bear patch - pictures will be coming later in August.

My Dad's cancer is back (and this, specifically for the cousins or aunts, please don't tell anyone ESPECIALLY Dad you saw it here if he hasn't told anyone but me. I suspect he hasn't -and please don't tell Grandma, he will if he wants to) - but it's back in a very limited scope, and it looks like he'll be coming here for treatment, at least surgery. He's optimistic and it sounds like he has every reason for being so. Please throw a prayer upwards if that is your kind of thing. I'm very attached to him.

Jumping into the week to come - things seem to be moving forward on the job front as far as Sybil's replacement, we have another "Weekend at Willie's" coming up next weekend along with TWO weddings (no Funeral, thankfully!) AND the Golden Mallet Tournament (more to come on that). We have to move back home so we can afford this social whirl, given the price of gas.

Have a great week!

Things I Got From My Dad

(Yes, Things I Got From My Mom Will Be Next.)

This is not meant to be a complete list.

1) My middle name - check it out, he denies it but the date on this video is quite telling.



2) My love of dirt bikes, fishing (if catching something) and horses. Not that I get to indulge much these days.

3) My love of The Supremes, Surfaris and Paul Revere and the Raiders.

4) My Quixotic approach to life (yes, I realize this can be futile, but it's nice to be idealistic).

5) My Blue Eyes.

6) The Green Bay Packers.

7) After some struggles along the way, because he's a cowboy and always will be, a sense of how much he loves me.

Thanks Dad.

New Masthead

Hey, check out the new masthead - taken by yours truly and somehow cropped and blown up to look, as Big Bit said "professional". I say this modestly because he sounded amazed that I could do this. While I don't think it's professional looking I like it because it sums up how I feel some days - stuck in a snow bound mountain permanently.

Other days are quite different of course!

Been working on a lengthy post that I need to review tomorrow to decide if I'm a) whining, b) asking for advice or c) need to abandon because I need to start realizing I'm an adult and deal with the reality of the world.

So, check back tomorrow to see if it's a serious post or a picture of the cats from icanhascheezburger.com. Who knows which lostinutah will win?