I toyed with this topic - I love Wide Open Spaces by the Dixie Chicks. When it came out it so reminded me of me as a young willful kid - "I know how to do it better than you." Of course, that is so not true, yet in a way it is.
Today I got tickets to see that jazz great (and Boise/Capitol High native) Curtis Stigers. I'm going with friend Shawn since The Husband will be out of town - getting to join him for a couple of days in Reno later in the week, yay!
I posted a while back the boys and I got to sit by Curtis at Gernika and I ogled him (subtly) because he is a) gorgeous and b) talented.
Just so you have a frame of reference, really the first time I really saw much of Curtis, he looked like this:
The last time I saw Curtis, (I've seen him sing a couple of times in the interim) he looked like this:
It's interesting how this mirrors "Wide Open Spaces" - you start out this kid who knows it all, and you end up 25 years later this wiser, happier person who STILL, STILL, sings the same tune. In a way. And you can still look really good - even with gray hair.
Really looking forward to seeing him Monday.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
Progress?
Here I am, actually blogging. Shocking, eh? I know! (Craig Ferguson voice.)
Blogosophere, don't feel neglected - it's bad enough that my lovely stepmother called me to see if I was alive. Yes, she agrees my father could call me. He doesn't. Unless it's my birthday. I don't take it personally anymore but when things get going enough that life is especially crazy, I don't think of calling him until 8:30 p.m. and then he's asleep. I reassured her I'm still alive and think about them lots. We'll probably try and run down over Thanksgiving weekend. Turkey Day itself will be quietly at home. TH has to have hernia surgery two days before so he will be moving gingerly I am sure.
(Hernia surgery? Seriously? Old people have hernias. Oh, he's 47 you say? Oh my heck.)
Big Bit is doing well at College of Idaho. He's taking midterms this week, has made a few friends and is ready for his fall break next week, in which he will take Reno on for several days. His Dad is doing well, the cancer seems to have been a scare and not a glaring reality, for which I am deeply thankful.
Little Bit is cruising through 6th grade fairly well, as has been the case each year there are less issues with the transition. I'm a little concerned about the transition to junior high. No, let me be honest. I'm terrified. He's so intelligent but emotionally a little immature - and holding him back academically would be a disaster. His counselor that he's been seeing for a while now suggested a charter school here in Boise that has a junior high. We're seriously considering it. It's not far from TH's work so that wouldn't be especially problematic but it has a lottery so who knows if he'd actually get in anyway. There's also a private school that might be an option. (ouch.)
Not getting the potential job seems to have been a blessing in disguise, but the current one is driving me starkers as they say in the UK. Still, it is better than unemployment, so I will strive to persevere.
The Packers beat the Vikings. You may not have heard. This of course was huge. I'm still grinning. Now if Nevada beats BSU my football experience for this year may hit it's zenith. Those Oregon Ducks are the team I'm rooting for otherwise. ;)
My birthday is Saturday and unfortunately I didn't win the Packers trip to see the Jets game and the new Broadway play Lombardi this weekend. Sigh. Nor can I go to the Rally for Sanity, as much fun as that would be. Little Bit wants to go to Boo at the Zoo Saturday so that should be fun. He's going to be Harry Potter. I promise to post pictures of that.
I promise to be a little more active here. Now that it's dark, I'm not tempted to spend all of my time outside.
Blogosophere, don't feel neglected - it's bad enough that my lovely stepmother called me to see if I was alive. Yes, she agrees my father could call me. He doesn't. Unless it's my birthday. I don't take it personally anymore but when things get going enough that life is especially crazy, I don't think of calling him until 8:30 p.m. and then he's asleep. I reassured her I'm still alive and think about them lots. We'll probably try and run down over Thanksgiving weekend. Turkey Day itself will be quietly at home. TH has to have hernia surgery two days before so he will be moving gingerly I am sure.
(Hernia surgery? Seriously? Old people have hernias. Oh, he's 47 you say? Oh my heck.)
Big Bit is doing well at College of Idaho. He's taking midterms this week, has made a few friends and is ready for his fall break next week, in which he will take Reno on for several days. His Dad is doing well, the cancer seems to have been a scare and not a glaring reality, for which I am deeply thankful.
Little Bit is cruising through 6th grade fairly well, as has been the case each year there are less issues with the transition. I'm a little concerned about the transition to junior high. No, let me be honest. I'm terrified. He's so intelligent but emotionally a little immature - and holding him back academically would be a disaster. His counselor that he's been seeing for a while now suggested a charter school here in Boise that has a junior high. We're seriously considering it. It's not far from TH's work so that wouldn't be especially problematic but it has a lottery so who knows if he'd actually get in anyway. There's also a private school that might be an option. (ouch.)
Not getting the potential job seems to have been a blessing in disguise, but the current one is driving me starkers as they say in the UK. Still, it is better than unemployment, so I will strive to persevere.
The Packers beat the Vikings. You may not have heard. This of course was huge. I'm still grinning. Now if Nevada beats BSU my football experience for this year may hit it's zenith. Those Oregon Ducks are the team I'm rooting for otherwise. ;)
My birthday is Saturday and unfortunately I didn't win the Packers trip to see the Jets game and the new Broadway play Lombardi this weekend. Sigh. Nor can I go to the Rally for Sanity, as much fun as that would be. Little Bit wants to go to Boo at the Zoo Saturday so that should be fun. He's going to be Harry Potter. I promise to post pictures of that.
I promise to be a little more active here. Now that it's dark, I'm not tempted to spend all of my time outside.
Monday, October 4, 2010
How To Win Friends and Influence Bear Fans
Here's a draft of my first blog post for PocketDoppler.com which I hope will publish tomorrow.
Many thanks to Wally for asking me to participate in these shenanigans. Hopefully you'll find the view of a (somewhat) Violent Femme worthwhile reading.
As a bit of an introduction, I've been a Packer fan for most of my life, thanks to my Dad - a huge fan of the Lombardi-era Packers, especially Jerry Kramer (as most of my family has attended University of Idaho). The story I like to tell is that I was sitting on his lap at a few months old watching Super Bowl I. If not, I must have been in the next room listening to him cheer, because I imprinted. I read his well-thumbed copy of Instant Replay when I was about 7 or 8 and it was all over with. I was hooked.
Over the past 20 years, my interest has become more intense. Now, thanks to the power of blogs such as CheeseheadTV and Twitter, I've come to feel a part of a community of fans. I think those of us who don't live anywhere near Wisconsin find this connection maybe more important than your local Packer fan realizes, because we don't often run into someone on the street who has a similar passion for our team. In fact, around here, you're more likely to meet a Denver Bronco or San Francisco 49er fan. Shudder.
I've seen a fair amount of bickering on the Packer fan blogs, sometimes to the point of name calling after a big loss, or especially during the whole Favregate fiasco. In general, however, except for the occasional presence of a troll, people at least repect the main premise of why we're all there - we love and support the Green Bay Packers, come what may.
I realized during the Super Bowl vs. Denver that I had a little problem with confrontation. We were at a friend's house for a Super Bowl party who really didn't know anything about football, which is fine, but who made the mistake (to me) of inviting a rabid Broncos fan, male, who found out I loved the Packers and went after me with the intensity of a diamond tipped drill bit. Once he knew he was bothering me, he wouldn't shut up. Usually I'm pretty quick with a quip or pointed comment, but I just sat there, and after that last, awful play got up quietly, walked out the door and went home. And cried, I must confess. (Of course, that wasn't the last time Favre made me cry.)
Last week I was reminded as to my utter inability to trash talk. A new tweep, from my town, found out my loyalties were (I can't believe he could figure it out....) and revealed himself as a Bears fan. Not just a Bears fan, but a trash talking, Packer hating, McMahon worshiping Bears fan. In an awful case of deja vu, with laser like focus he set about annoying me. I tried to play it off for a while, I tried to respond and be funny but it got worse and finally I had just had enough. So I did what any girl should(n't) do, I ran to my band of Packer fan brothers in the Twitter world and one of them was kind enough to take said Bear fanboy on.
During the Bear game on Sunday the insults flew thick and fast between them while I watched from the Twitter sidelines. If I was a betting woman (and I am) I would have bet that one, or both, was totally beside himself with rage. Then, suddenly, all was totally laid back and smiley faces. Peace and joy reigned. Each had worn himself out, I guess, and felt better, perhaps taking comfort in the united knowledge that the Vikings, too, suck.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I somehow, someway, take all of it too seriously to trash talk well. That seems odd to me, because I've seen men who I know bleed green and gold even more than I do (and therefore one would assume might care more) engage in exchanges that would make a truck driver blush. I have a cousin I'm very close to who is a Bears fan, but our "discussion" of the rivalry comes down to a twice a year my posting on my personal blog "The Bears Still Suck" video and his verbal flailing once they (usually) lose. No harm, no foul, no name calling. That's the extent of my trash talking experience.
Is this a female trait, or am I merely an example of a timid Packer fan that just needs to get some thicker skin and jump in the fray with the trash talkers? I don't know. I consulted with Jayme Joers from BrentFavre.com and she said she thought maybe we female sports fans are a little more emotional about our support. Understandable? Maybe, but when you don't know how to respond to someone it's just annoying. I'd love to have a better reaction than stony silence.
Two things I know for sure is The Bears Still Suck, and I still suck at trash talk.
Many thanks to Wally for asking me to participate in these shenanigans. Hopefully you'll find the view of a (somewhat) Violent Femme worthwhile reading.
As a bit of an introduction, I've been a Packer fan for most of my life, thanks to my Dad - a huge fan of the Lombardi-era Packers, especially Jerry Kramer (as most of my family has attended University of Idaho). The story I like to tell is that I was sitting on his lap at a few months old watching Super Bowl I. If not, I must have been in the next room listening to him cheer, because I imprinted. I read his well-thumbed copy of Instant Replay when I was about 7 or 8 and it was all over with. I was hooked.
Over the past 20 years, my interest has become more intense. Now, thanks to the power of blogs such as CheeseheadTV and Twitter, I've come to feel a part of a community of fans. I think those of us who don't live anywhere near Wisconsin find this connection maybe more important than your local Packer fan realizes, because we don't often run into someone on the street who has a similar passion for our team. In fact, around here, you're more likely to meet a Denver Bronco or San Francisco 49er fan. Shudder.
I've seen a fair amount of bickering on the Packer fan blogs, sometimes to the point of name calling after a big loss, or especially during the whole Favregate fiasco. In general, however, except for the occasional presence of a troll, people at least repect the main premise of why we're all there - we love and support the Green Bay Packers, come what may.
I realized during the Super Bowl vs. Denver that I had a little problem with confrontation. We were at a friend's house for a Super Bowl party who really didn't know anything about football, which is fine, but who made the mistake (to me) of inviting a rabid Broncos fan, male, who found out I loved the Packers and went after me with the intensity of a diamond tipped drill bit. Once he knew he was bothering me, he wouldn't shut up. Usually I'm pretty quick with a quip or pointed comment, but I just sat there, and after that last, awful play got up quietly, walked out the door and went home. And cried, I must confess. (Of course, that wasn't the last time Favre made me cry.)
Last week I was reminded as to my utter inability to trash talk. A new tweep, from my town, found out my loyalties were (I can't believe he could figure it out....) and revealed himself as a Bears fan. Not just a Bears fan, but a trash talking, Packer hating, McMahon worshiping Bears fan. In an awful case of deja vu, with laser like focus he set about annoying me. I tried to play it off for a while, I tried to respond and be funny but it got worse and finally I had just had enough. So I did what any girl should(n't) do, I ran to my band of Packer fan brothers in the Twitter world and one of them was kind enough to take said Bear fanboy on.
During the Bear game on Sunday the insults flew thick and fast between them while I watched from the Twitter sidelines. If I was a betting woman (and I am) I would have bet that one, or both, was totally beside himself with rage. Then, suddenly, all was totally laid back and smiley faces. Peace and joy reigned. Each had worn himself out, I guess, and felt better, perhaps taking comfort in the united knowledge that the Vikings, too, suck.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I somehow, someway, take all of it too seriously to trash talk well. That seems odd to me, because I've seen men who I know bleed green and gold even more than I do (and therefore one would assume might care more) engage in exchanges that would make a truck driver blush. I have a cousin I'm very close to who is a Bears fan, but our "discussion" of the rivalry comes down to a twice a year my posting on my personal blog "The Bears Still Suck" video and his verbal flailing once they (usually) lose. No harm, no foul, no name calling. That's the extent of my trash talking experience.
Is this a female trait, or am I merely an example of a timid Packer fan that just needs to get some thicker skin and jump in the fray with the trash talkers? I don't know. I consulted with Jayme Joers from BrentFavre.com and she said she thought maybe we female sports fans are a little more emotional about our support. Understandable? Maybe, but when you don't know how to respond to someone it's just annoying. I'd love to have a better reaction than stony silence.
Two things I know for sure is The Bears Still Suck, and I still suck at trash talk.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Talk Thursday - Progressions
Life is weird sometimes. Well, if you're me, it's weird all the time, but that's another story for another Talk Thursday.
One of the reasons I didn't write over the summer is I was just working through stuff. I keep thinking "You're in your 40's, you're supposed to have this all figured out." But I don't, and I keep working at it. I've been frustrated because I don't have a job I love. I love where I live, and when we moved back I remember telling TH "I can hate my job or I can hate where I live, but I can't hate both, I'll never make it." In some ways this is true. I couldn't. But I find disliking one or the other very disheartening. Don Quixote, quit tilting at windmills.
I've been trying to find paths in which I can feel fulfilled in different ways at my output, even if it's not output I get paid for. That's a bit challenging given that I do have a job, a family and I'm trying to get a professional certification that's good for the resume if not much else.
Today a few weird things happened. Two of them positive, one not in a way but a way that made me thoughtful. Today was truly a progression for me, and that's not an experience I've had in a while.
First, when I got to work, I had a message from @wallypingel on Twitter asking me if I'd be interested in providing a female sports/Packers perspective to his blog, PocketDoppler.com. I "met" Wally through CheeseheadTV and he has some people he collaborates on this site, which definitely has content of interest to me. I thought for a couple of hours - I love to write, I've been told I'm good at it professionally but for entertainment? Whew. But, I was thinking yesterday that I would love to do something like be a professional sportswriter, or a blogger that became financially solvent for it. Aaron Nagler from CheeseheadTv was featured in the New York Times yesterday along with his partner in crime Corey Behnke. They don't do this for a living. YET. But I think they might pull it off. I don't think I ever would but I thought - what the hell? So I'm going to have a weekly post for Wally unless he thinks I suck at writing. In which case you will never hear another mention of this again.
Second - had a great lunch with the colleague who's daughter is attending school with Big Bit and we found out that we had much in common - we both love Craig Ferguson, we both have surreptitious piles of "important" papers on various counter corners in our house, our college freshmen both break our hearts occasionally - you name it. The progression part though is that she had a project that she needed help with that was up my alley - how our company could use social media. I jumped at the chance because whether it results in advancement or not, I knew I would enjoy it and it IS professionally related output. Yay!
The last thing was sad in a way, and yes, in a minor way, but still. Greg Bedard from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, my Twitter buddy that came to see TH and I in Seattle, is leaving Wisconsin and moving to work for the Boston Globe as their premier NFL writer. Very cool for Greg, he's from the region and loves the Red Sox, but I was momentarily crushed, because he and I chatter about things every so often that are much beyond the Packers. Real Housewives of... (he and his wife love it, I DO NOT get it at all), last night we chatted about the Rutgers student's suicide because Greg went to Rutgers and I knew he'd be crushed, and other things now and again. Then I stopped and thought - you know, if I have any kind of connection in reality here to this very nice man, it's not going to stop because he leaves Wisconsin. Not like he lives next door to me in Boise, after all. And if we don't keep chattering, I know it was part of his professional obligation to talk to fans but he did it like a gentleman and that in this day and age is refreshing.
So - some new things for me to do, to think about, to write about and hopefully they'll result in some personal growth and accentuate the good things that seem to be brewing or already exist in my life. Start being appreciative, damn it. (I remind myself.)
One of the reasons I didn't write over the summer is I was just working through stuff. I keep thinking "You're in your 40's, you're supposed to have this all figured out." But I don't, and I keep working at it. I've been frustrated because I don't have a job I love. I love where I live, and when we moved back I remember telling TH "I can hate my job or I can hate where I live, but I can't hate both, I'll never make it." In some ways this is true. I couldn't. But I find disliking one or the other very disheartening. Don Quixote, quit tilting at windmills.
I've been trying to find paths in which I can feel fulfilled in different ways at my output, even if it's not output I get paid for. That's a bit challenging given that I do have a job, a family and I'm trying to get a professional certification that's good for the resume if not much else.
Today a few weird things happened. Two of them positive, one not in a way but a way that made me thoughtful. Today was truly a progression for me, and that's not an experience I've had in a while.
First, when I got to work, I had a message from @wallypingel on Twitter asking me if I'd be interested in providing a female sports/Packers perspective to his blog, PocketDoppler.com. I "met" Wally through CheeseheadTV and he has some people he collaborates on this site, which definitely has content of interest to me. I thought for a couple of hours - I love to write, I've been told I'm good at it professionally but for entertainment? Whew. But, I was thinking yesterday that I would love to do something like be a professional sportswriter, or a blogger that became financially solvent for it. Aaron Nagler from CheeseheadTv was featured in the New York Times yesterday along with his partner in crime Corey Behnke. They don't do this for a living. YET. But I think they might pull it off. I don't think I ever would but I thought - what the hell? So I'm going to have a weekly post for Wally unless he thinks I suck at writing. In which case you will never hear another mention of this again.
Second - had a great lunch with the colleague who's daughter is attending school with Big Bit and we found out that we had much in common - we both love Craig Ferguson, we both have surreptitious piles of "important" papers on various counter corners in our house, our college freshmen both break our hearts occasionally - you name it. The progression part though is that she had a project that she needed help with that was up my alley - how our company could use social media. I jumped at the chance because whether it results in advancement or not, I knew I would enjoy it and it IS professionally related output. Yay!
The last thing was sad in a way, and yes, in a minor way, but still. Greg Bedard from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, my Twitter buddy that came to see TH and I in Seattle, is leaving Wisconsin and moving to work for the Boston Globe as their premier NFL writer. Very cool for Greg, he's from the region and loves the Red Sox, but I was momentarily crushed, because he and I chatter about things every so often that are much beyond the Packers. Real Housewives of... (he and his wife love it, I DO NOT get it at all), last night we chatted about the Rutgers student's suicide because Greg went to Rutgers and I knew he'd be crushed, and other things now and again. Then I stopped and thought - you know, if I have any kind of connection in reality here to this very nice man, it's not going to stop because he leaves Wisconsin. Not like he lives next door to me in Boise, after all. And if we don't keep chattering, I know it was part of his professional obligation to talk to fans but he did it like a gentleman and that in this day and age is refreshing.
So - some new things for me to do, to think about, to write about and hopefully they'll result in some personal growth and accentuate the good things that seem to be brewing or already exist in my life. Start being appreciative, damn it. (I remind myself.)
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
The Bears Still Suck
Well, I didn't get the job, so I'm going to hang on until after the first of the year as certain good things will come my way if I do. Keep your fingers crossed that something happens after that. I know, I know, and I do believe things happen for a reason but sometimes it's really hard to see what that reason is.
In other related bad news, Monday Night Football sucked. (I know, Steven, you enjoyed it hugely.)
I don't care if the Bears won, they played the absolute worst game for the most part that I've seen and still managed to win - because the Packers beat themselves. McCarthy should be shot for making bad challenges - I think he went to the Childress School for the Criminally Insane NFL Head Coaches.
On the other hand, Aaron Rodgers played a beautiful game. Kid, you're growing up. *Sniff*
I remember how dismayed I was when Brent left and how I worried about Aaron's durability. I wasn't alone, I know, but I feel guilty now in the face of his grace, good humor and ability to suffer way too many sacks last year. He retweeted me this summer (this, folks, is a big deal) and I printed it out to frame and put in my pool room. Brent wouldn't know how to type, much less how to treat fans nicely on Twitter.
Anyhow, since I can't rub it in cousin Steve's face about the loss by playing one of my favorite tunes ( I LOVE a good polka), I'd like to play this particular tune for Brian Urlacher and Jay Cutler. Dudes, no one made you King of Anything.
And the Packers aren't drowning. That is all.
In other related bad news, Monday Night Football sucked. (I know, Steven, you enjoyed it hugely.)
I don't care if the Bears won, they played the absolute worst game for the most part that I've seen and still managed to win - because the Packers beat themselves. McCarthy should be shot for making bad challenges - I think he went to the Childress School for the Criminally Insane NFL Head Coaches.
On the other hand, Aaron Rodgers played a beautiful game. Kid, you're growing up. *Sniff*
I remember how dismayed I was when Brent left and how I worried about Aaron's durability. I wasn't alone, I know, but I feel guilty now in the face of his grace, good humor and ability to suffer way too many sacks last year. He retweeted me this summer (this, folks, is a big deal) and I printed it out to frame and put in my pool room. Brent wouldn't know how to type, much less how to treat fans nicely on Twitter.
Anyhow, since I can't rub it in cousin Steve's face about the loss by playing one of my favorite tunes ( I LOVE a good polka), I'd like to play this particular tune for Brian Urlacher and Jay Cutler. Dudes, no one made you King of Anything.
And the Packers aren't drowning. That is all.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Talk Thursday - What I Learned - And Did - This Summer
Wow. I don't think I've ever gone this long without posting. It's been a wacky summer, kids. Some ways good, some ways bad, all ways more than I wanted, I think.
I've done a lot, and a lot of nothing. It depends on which week/month it was. I promise to post some pics of our trip to DC, but in the meantime, here's what I was up to this summer.
Things I Did:
Went to Reno to see Big Bit graduate. Mom, TH, Little Bit and I made the trip and my cousin the Godmother made a detour from her vacation in order to see her Godson graduate. It was a good weekend and really amazing. Big Bit asked me if I cried afterwards, to which TH responded "How many times would you like to hear about?" Too true. All I could think of was him in his little pink and blue cap laying in my arms while I said "Hi Dude, welcome to the world." It goes so damn fast.
Got hooked on Twitter. It gives the instant gratification a distracted Type A personality like me seems to require. I've had some great interactions with people there, some famous (Kelsey Grammer), some known to many (Mike Freeman, who writes for CBS Sports Online, has written several books and apparently wants to kidnap my beagle) and some known only to me. That may have been part of the reason I haven't blogged, and I know Kris has alluded to this as well...you've kind of said things you wanted to say and that takes away from the will to write. If you don't Twitter, you might like it. If you ever do and you follow me, it's really me, warts, liberal viewpoint, Packer obsession and all. You have been warned.
Went to Washington, DC. Awesome week. Did not want to go home. Could live there if I could live in the city. Have to make much more money to live in the city than I think I can. We hit about everything you could want to, including the White House and the Capitol tours (thank you Senator Crapo, I'll never vote for you but still). Met @thewino (Kris), @htphelps (Holly) and @KingMonkeyPants (James Bond), the first two being lovely ladies who blog about life (Kris) and the Packers (Holly) and now are on Twitter as well, the latter a dear friend of Kris' who is a source of absolute joy to me with his abundant humor on Twitter. I would have taken a picture of all of them, but KMP has some sort of super secret government job and I think he would have had to shoot us had he been photographed (I keed, I keed). The whole family was taken with them, to the point that when we went to National Airport (as the locals still call it) to fly home, Little Bit sadly waved out the window of the Metro and said "Bye, Monkey."
Not something I did - but - TH won the Golden Mallet tournament. AGAIN. Friend Steve was a bit apoplectic, because it's Steve's party, on Steve's birthday (this year) and he lost that damn mallet again. He'd gained it back for all of one year.
Had our annual Fourth of July BBQ so we could all troop over to the Depot and watch fireworks. Little Bit had a friend over, friends Steve and Bob brought their kids and everyone had a blast. The amount of munitions in our driveway the next day spoke for themselves.
Went to the Braun Brothers Family Reunion weekend in Challis. Never have been, always wanted to go (an old friend of TH's used to play in their band WAY back when) and finally did. I knew Muzzie and Billy's Mom and Dad when I was little and they were very sweet.
Mom organized it and we had a lot of fun. I think we'll go back next year but I will take earplugs because while I can still party, I can't stay up until 4 a.m. with the kids from LSU; or, to be honest, the nice cowboy and his wife (older than us!) from central Washington who were riding their bicycles in the dark at midnight while TH and I had a last beer and chuckled our heads off. They were very nice though and offered us breakfast the next day.
Went to Seattle for a PACKER game - Woohoo! Okay, here's the thing, Seattle contingent, including not only family but my Packer blog buddy Cuphound - we got there Friday night, ate dinner, went to bed, got up Saturday morning, ate breakfast, went into Seattle on the light rail (we stayed by the airport), had lunch with my old boss, Jenny, who we haven't seen in over a year, went to a tailgate party that I had been invited to by the Northwest Packer Backers, met another Twitter buddy @Greg_A_Bedard who writes for the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel (boy was I nervous, but he's just a nice, witty, guy who likes to write about the Packers and their crazy fans like me), went to the stadium, ate, watched the game, took the light rail back, got up, had lunch and flew home. Whew. Next time I go over there I'm going to have more time and less things booked.
Things I learned:
It sucks when your teenager really starts acting like one. It was a rough summer with Big Bit, he tended to disappear off the face of the earth once he got back from vacation with his Dad. He wanted to spend most of the summer in Reno with his friends, understandably, but he also decided that he never needed to talk to me just to let me know he was alive (much less had he done any of the things he needed to do...yeah, Mom was asking), there were a few tears and a couple of irritated conversations. If you've gotten to 18.5 years without having all this attitude, I think it surprises you even more. Thank God for my sister-in-law who provided the exact perspective I needed after one of these conversations as she had gone through the same thing - late rebellion. Now Big Bit is here, all is fine and back to a different kind of normal and he's ready to kick off Welcome Week this weekend and get in the swim of college life. I'm excited for him, but I think he might be more excited, though nervous.
Life is damn hard and I'm not as resilient as I used to be. I am grateful to have a decent job with good pay in this economy. I am glad my boss is not Sybil and her boss (and his boss) seem to like me. Still, there are many writings on the wall which say the long term prospects are not good. I'm tired of feeling underutilized and overbored. I've been working on the attitude but it's hard. (Whiner, you say? You would be right and I've said that to myself.) There is a possibility of a job on the horizon that in some ways looks promising and in some ways looks scary due to some inside info I have. I should know if I have it next week. Without divulging much, let's just say that it involves a very stable employer. And a pension. And those are very, very attractive things.
I probably don't have the patience to really learn to play piano, but God bless my friend Allen for trying to teach me.
I am technically old enough to be Aaron Rodgers' mother. Damn, that's depressing.
Our little Mario beagle has a big heart and a fierce growl. We think he may have been abused because the poor little guy recoils if you even raise your voice. Big Bit terrified him accidentally with a fly swatter of all things. But he's very dear to us already.
Little Bit has to have some testing, probably in a couple of months, because the dr. we got referred to thinks he may have borderline Asperger's. Maybe not, but maybe. And while I'm grateful that it isn't worse, because obviously things always could be, I'm struggling more than a little bit with this particular bit of news.
I'm two months from being a year older and I don't think I'm any wiser. When does that kick in, exactly?
Lastly, I found out last night that the EHFH has a tumor on his liver and has to have a biopsy next week. He's only 44. Big Bit is understandably upset and concerned (as am I, actually) so please keep EHFH and Big Bit in your thoughts and prayers. With BB starting college next week here, the timing is of course impeccable. NOT.
So, in WAY more than a nutshell, that is what's been going on. I promise to write more so as not to write a novel again. I hope you've all been well and I promise you haven't been away from my thoughts.
I've done a lot, and a lot of nothing. It depends on which week/month it was. I promise to post some pics of our trip to DC, but in the meantime, here's what I was up to this summer.
Things I Did:
Went to Reno to see Big Bit graduate. Mom, TH, Little Bit and I made the trip and my cousin the Godmother made a detour from her vacation in order to see her Godson graduate. It was a good weekend and really amazing. Big Bit asked me if I cried afterwards, to which TH responded "How many times would you like to hear about?" Too true. All I could think of was him in his little pink and blue cap laying in my arms while I said "Hi Dude, welcome to the world." It goes so damn fast.
Got hooked on Twitter. It gives the instant gratification a distracted Type A personality like me seems to require. I've had some great interactions with people there, some famous (Kelsey Grammer), some known to many (Mike Freeman, who writes for CBS Sports Online, has written several books and apparently wants to kidnap my beagle) and some known only to me. That may have been part of the reason I haven't blogged, and I know Kris has alluded to this as well...you've kind of said things you wanted to say and that takes away from the will to write. If you don't Twitter, you might like it. If you ever do and you follow me, it's really me, warts, liberal viewpoint, Packer obsession and all. You have been warned.
Went to Washington, DC. Awesome week. Did not want to go home. Could live there if I could live in the city. Have to make much more money to live in the city than I think I can. We hit about everything you could want to, including the White House and the Capitol tours (thank you Senator Crapo, I'll never vote for you but still). Met @thewino (Kris), @htphelps (Holly) and @KingMonkeyPants (James Bond), the first two being lovely ladies who blog about life (Kris) and the Packers (Holly) and now are on Twitter as well, the latter a dear friend of Kris' who is a source of absolute joy to me with his abundant humor on Twitter. I would have taken a picture of all of them, but KMP has some sort of super secret government job and I think he would have had to shoot us had he been photographed (I keed, I keed). The whole family was taken with them, to the point that when we went to National Airport (as the locals still call it) to fly home, Little Bit sadly waved out the window of the Metro and said "Bye, Monkey."
Not something I did - but - TH won the Golden Mallet tournament. AGAIN. Friend Steve was a bit apoplectic, because it's Steve's party, on Steve's birthday (this year) and he lost that damn mallet again. He'd gained it back for all of one year.
Had our annual Fourth of July BBQ so we could all troop over to the Depot and watch fireworks. Little Bit had a friend over, friends Steve and Bob brought their kids and everyone had a blast. The amount of munitions in our driveway the next day spoke for themselves.
Went to the Braun Brothers Family Reunion weekend in Challis. Never have been, always wanted to go (an old friend of TH's used to play in their band WAY back when) and finally did. I knew Muzzie and Billy's Mom and Dad when I was little and they were very sweet.
Mom organized it and we had a lot of fun. I think we'll go back next year but I will take earplugs because while I can still party, I can't stay up until 4 a.m. with the kids from LSU; or, to be honest, the nice cowboy and his wife (older than us!) from central Washington who were riding their bicycles in the dark at midnight while TH and I had a last beer and chuckled our heads off. They were very nice though and offered us breakfast the next day.
Went to Seattle for a PACKER game - Woohoo! Okay, here's the thing, Seattle contingent, including not only family but my Packer blog buddy Cuphound - we got there Friday night, ate dinner, went to bed, got up Saturday morning, ate breakfast, went into Seattle on the light rail (we stayed by the airport), had lunch with my old boss, Jenny, who we haven't seen in over a year, went to a tailgate party that I had been invited to by the Northwest Packer Backers, met another Twitter buddy @Greg_A_Bedard who writes for the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel (boy was I nervous, but he's just a nice, witty, guy who likes to write about the Packers and their crazy fans like me), went to the stadium, ate, watched the game, took the light rail back, got up, had lunch and flew home. Whew. Next time I go over there I'm going to have more time and less things booked.
Things I learned:
It sucks when your teenager really starts acting like one. It was a rough summer with Big Bit, he tended to disappear off the face of the earth once he got back from vacation with his Dad. He wanted to spend most of the summer in Reno with his friends, understandably, but he also decided that he never needed to talk to me just to let me know he was alive (much less had he done any of the things he needed to do...yeah, Mom was asking), there were a few tears and a couple of irritated conversations. If you've gotten to 18.5 years without having all this attitude, I think it surprises you even more. Thank God for my sister-in-law who provided the exact perspective I needed after one of these conversations as she had gone through the same thing - late rebellion. Now Big Bit is here, all is fine and back to a different kind of normal and he's ready to kick off Welcome Week this weekend and get in the swim of college life. I'm excited for him, but I think he might be more excited, though nervous.
Life is damn hard and I'm not as resilient as I used to be. I am grateful to have a decent job with good pay in this economy. I am glad my boss is not Sybil and her boss (and his boss) seem to like me. Still, there are many writings on the wall which say the long term prospects are not good. I'm tired of feeling underutilized and overbored. I've been working on the attitude but it's hard. (Whiner, you say? You would be right and I've said that to myself.) There is a possibility of a job on the horizon that in some ways looks promising and in some ways looks scary due to some inside info I have. I should know if I have it next week. Without divulging much, let's just say that it involves a very stable employer. And a pension. And those are very, very attractive things.
I probably don't have the patience to really learn to play piano, but God bless my friend Allen for trying to teach me.
I am technically old enough to be Aaron Rodgers' mother. Damn, that's depressing.
Our little Mario beagle has a big heart and a fierce growl. We think he may have been abused because the poor little guy recoils if you even raise your voice. Big Bit terrified him accidentally with a fly swatter of all things. But he's very dear to us already.
Little Bit has to have some testing, probably in a couple of months, because the dr. we got referred to thinks he may have borderline Asperger's. Maybe not, but maybe. And while I'm grateful that it isn't worse, because obviously things always could be, I'm struggling more than a little bit with this particular bit of news.
I'm two months from being a year older and I don't think I'm any wiser. When does that kick in, exactly?
Lastly, I found out last night that the EHFH has a tumor on his liver and has to have a biopsy next week. He's only 44. Big Bit is understandably upset and concerned (as am I, actually) so please keep EHFH and Big Bit in your thoughts and prayers. With BB starting college next week here, the timing is of course impeccable. NOT.
So, in WAY more than a nutshell, that is what's been going on. I promise to write more so as not to write a novel again. I hope you've all been well and I promise you haven't been away from my thoughts.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Right after 9/11, TH and I were fortunate enough to go to Sun Valley, thanks to Jenny the old boss and her free tix to see James Taylor. The world at that time seemed quite upset and wrong, as everyone knows. He made us feel so, so much calmer and optimistic. This video is earlier, but quite representative of the reaction he got in Idaho. His daughter, Sally, played with him. I remember him saying, "It's so important we keep on going, though right now it's so hard." Those words have resonated with me, over and over, to this day.
James, I need you to come play a concert in my backyard. Just sayin'. Please?
One of the best times in my life, that concert was, even in the face of such tragedy in our country. Always remember.
James, I need you to come play a concert in my backyard. Just sayin'. Please?
One of the best times in my life, that concert was, even in the face of such tragedy in our country. Always remember.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
'Nuff Said
Note: I had a Paul Thorn video posted here because I was feeling sorry for myself. It's a song called "I Have a Good Day Every Now and Then". I went back to make a note to say I was okay, just having an incredibly horrible day. Somehow I deleted the video. Sigh.
I plan on blogging this weekend about the last month, which really has had lots of high points. Now if I only knew how to deal with the mundane.
I plan on blogging this weekend about the last month, which really has had lots of high points. Now if I only knew how to deal with the mundane.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Lost in Idaho
Yes, you used to call me lostinutah, but these days I seem to be lostinidaho. Not in the same sense, but I know I've been remiss in trying to write anything whatsoever or comment on others blogs. Though I see some other people are having the same problem. :)
What has been going on? I don't know that it's anything specific...a tad bit of laziness, no doubt, but also just life being life and me ending up watching David Letterman, seeing the Top 10 list and realizing I'm going to be just as tired in the morning as I was the morning of the current day.
The job has been...the job. I've had a couple of nasty surprises in the last week that don't threaten my employment but do seem to confirm that it will lack the thing I like about my field - creativity. Not that I've been allowed to have much anyway, but what I did have is slowly being eliminated by our Corporate structure. (Not at me, mind you, just generally.) I have applied internally for a job that I think I would love, that is a stretch opportunity but one I had some exposure to in Utah. The person I would work for I think I would truly love to be around - she and I have bonded over our children are both going to that fine institution next year I've mentioned previously. We'll see - the recruiter for the job (same guy that was my recruiter for this job) seems to think I'll get an interview at least but the wheels of justice turn slowly.
Memorial Day weekend was a blur. We went to friend Renee's party (lots of fun) but first...we acquired a new family member.
This is Mario, our new evil pet. (Those of you who parent or grandparent Ninentdo addicts will get the name.) He is a 2 year old Beagle, who was a stray at the shelter and we nabbed him. We were going to wait until we got back from our trip to Washington D.C. to celebrate Big Bit's graduation but Beagles don't come through the shelter very often so we nabbed him. Friend Ra will watch him while we're in Reno and a little bit of the D.C. time when Mom is on a Harley ride to Elko.
We also went (late) to my uncles(s) and aunt(s) anniversary party. A supposedly brief lunch at Flatbread Pizza went sadly awry. In addition, I hate really paper-thin crust pizza. Shan't be back. Sorry to the family for showing up for the last 1/2 hour but I did enjoy seeing everyone. Then, we got to go see the new house my dad is having built. It's small, but cute, and when he retires and can't live in his company-provided housing anymore he will have a nice place to live. Sorry, no pics, but once it's done I'll nail some down.
Now - getting ready for graduation (I AM OLD) and our trip to DC. Big Bit has been another distraction (though always welcome) - he was having extreme bouts of senioritis and resenting authority (granted, the authority he was resenting I couldn't live with, so totally understood). To his credit, he got through it all and is great, but I appreciated the fact he wanted to talk to me about it all. I don't take that for granted by any means. Sometimes you see parents and their children grow apart and you wonder - how does that happen? I'm not sure. I don't want to experience it with my kids, so I plan on working hard at appreciating their worlds, even when I don't agree with them.
Back on a Sunday, Big Bit's college orientation on a Monday and then - off to D.C.! We were fortunate enough to score White House tour tickets through Senator Crapo - now if I just see an Obama I'll have a big grin on my face. I know. As if. And I know he's not perfect, okay? Thank you. Looking forward to seeing all the wonderful, inspiring sights that I've seen briefly on work visits to the D.C. area and much more that I've never been exposed to.
I also hope to meet up with Holly and Kris, a couple of ladies met through the blogosphere - we'll see how things shake out but it might be a lot of fun.
So, while I've been totally offline, I haven't been inactive. Hope all is well with everyone's world as well.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Talk Thursday: Endings...and Beginnings
Yep, I set the topic again, so I feel obligated to write. I have written on other's topics (maybe twice, to my shame) so I don't feel like I'm totally favoring myself. :)
Usually, endings are sad. The last few years I've had some that are happy, and some that are sad.
Happy Endings:
Leaving Utah
Child Support
Sad Endings:
My grandmother's passing
My doggie's passing
Beginnings are always more optimistic - there's so much room for opportunity to hope and dream about how things will turn out. The beginning we've experienced over the past few years are well documented on this blog.
When you get into your 40's, it's a little harder to find beginnings, frankly, at least for me. My kid's lives are really still beginning and that's fascinating, but it's their lives, not mine. I might start another new job in the next few years - but more and more, as friend Shawn says, the time I (and he) spent at the Mothership working for Jenny looks like an aberration in one's career, not a constant. Everything else has been a job. I've been with TH for almost 16 years and all signs point to it's going to last (thankfully!). I'm not moving ever again, I've decided, so that's out. Let's face it, I am truly the picture of your middle aged Mom.
But....
One thing that has happened is, in a way, a beginning for me. Big Bit has chosen a college. He is going to go to the College of Idaho, the fine institution I wrote about previously and which I attended for all of one semester. Because of the cost (private school = $$$) and because like me as a college freshman he doesn't feel like he would live well in a dorm, he's going to live with us. It's about a 25 mile drive one way, but trust me, the gas in his car (Honda Civic) in no way compares with the cost of living on campus, and he needs to stretch his dollars to last as long as possible.
Since he started school, we've had Big Bit with us a lot - during year round school, probably 4 months total or more of the year, summers during middle schools, weekends frequently etc. (Of course, prior to that I had him full or half time at least). He spent his freshman year in Utah with us, which was wonderful, but it ended badly (not because of anything he or I did, but a third force if you know who I mean) and he went back. He was worried for me and him if he stayed with me.
Now, he's an adult, or as Little Bit put it "He can do whatever he wants, can't he Mom?"
So, in an odd way, Big Bit's graduation, which is an ending, is a beginning for both him, and me. I don't look at him coming to school here as "I win" or anything like it. He picked a school he wants to go to, and we happen to live near it. It saves him money to live here, so he will have less student loan debt at the end.
But still, it's going to be fun to see college through his perspective. I hope he handles it all far, far better than I did. I think, in spite of his shyness that I fully share (and more) that he will be able to enjoy school and not do something stupid like get married (too soon).
Now to go see about selling a kidney to pay for school, as well as the new roof that we weren't supposed to need for 3 more years (augh). That is all.
Usually, endings are sad. The last few years I've had some that are happy, and some that are sad.
Happy Endings:
Leaving Utah
Child Support
Sad Endings:
My grandmother's passing
My doggie's passing
Beginnings are always more optimistic - there's so much room for opportunity to hope and dream about how things will turn out. The beginning we've experienced over the past few years are well documented on this blog.
When you get into your 40's, it's a little harder to find beginnings, frankly, at least for me. My kid's lives are really still beginning and that's fascinating, but it's their lives, not mine. I might start another new job in the next few years - but more and more, as friend Shawn says, the time I (and he) spent at the Mothership working for Jenny looks like an aberration in one's career, not a constant. Everything else has been a job. I've been with TH for almost 16 years and all signs point to it's going to last (thankfully!). I'm not moving ever again, I've decided, so that's out. Let's face it, I am truly the picture of your middle aged Mom.
But....
One thing that has happened is, in a way, a beginning for me. Big Bit has chosen a college. He is going to go to the College of Idaho, the fine institution I wrote about previously and which I attended for all of one semester. Because of the cost (private school = $$$) and because like me as a college freshman he doesn't feel like he would live well in a dorm, he's going to live with us. It's about a 25 mile drive one way, but trust me, the gas in his car (Honda Civic) in no way compares with the cost of living on campus, and he needs to stretch his dollars to last as long as possible.
Since he started school, we've had Big Bit with us a lot - during year round school, probably 4 months total or more of the year, summers during middle schools, weekends frequently etc. (Of course, prior to that I had him full or half time at least). He spent his freshman year in Utah with us, which was wonderful, but it ended badly (not because of anything he or I did, but a third force if you know who I mean) and he went back. He was worried for me and him if he stayed with me.
Now, he's an adult, or as Little Bit put it "He can do whatever he wants, can't he Mom?"
So, in an odd way, Big Bit's graduation, which is an ending, is a beginning for both him, and me. I don't look at him coming to school here as "I win" or anything like it. He picked a school he wants to go to, and we happen to live near it. It saves him money to live here, so he will have less student loan debt at the end.
But still, it's going to be fun to see college through his perspective. I hope he handles it all far, far better than I did. I think, in spite of his shyness that I fully share (and more) that he will be able to enjoy school and not do something stupid like get married (too soon).
Now to go see about selling a kidney to pay for school, as well as the new roof that we weren't supposed to need for 3 more years (augh). That is all.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
PAID IN FULL
As of yesterday....I have experienced an epic event. I PAID MY LAST CHILD SUPPORT CHECK. EVER. EVER. EVER.
Well, let me restate that. I have paid the last dime I have to pay that benefits someone other than my child more than my child himself. Let me clarify a bit. Actually, since January I have been paying Big Bit directly, as I had stated my preference to do so starting with his birthday and EHFH actually said (via Big Bit, of course) that it was fine to start early. So, this year hasn't been too bad.
However, it was a really weird feeling to mail that check yesterday. I am not glad Big Bit is grown up, mind you. (at least not all the time, most of the time I'd like him to be 7 again, and his brother a newborn - they were so stinking cute and one didn't talk back and the other couldn't!) Whether a child lives with you full time or not, that sensation of leaving the nest is one that I think is universal. It's an odd feeling to know he's in charge of his decisions and consequences and as of mid-June, whether he goes to school any further or not.
Also, I do not dispute the obligation of a "non-custodial" (term makes me laugh, 'cause kids, there's been a whole lot of "custodial" duties I've continued to perform through the years, from dental visits, to braces, to immunizations, to haircuts - all fun for me, actually) parent to pay money to the other in order to benefit the child. My beef was more around the fact I far rather would have put it into a college fund, which would be approximately twice the size of the check that Big Bit's other parent has given to him for college. And yes, he could afford to do without the money. As did I - when Big Bit lived with us in Utah, every cent I received went straight to his college fund. He was amazed at how much I'd actually accumulated from that time alone.
It's a really liberating feeling to know that from now on, ANYTHING I do for Big Bit financially is because I want to, because we've discussed it, and because it makes perfect sense (hopefully, anyway). I think I feel a little at loose ends. Odd.
Money, and Big Bit, have been the things that have tied me to EHFH for 16 years longer than I wished to be. I know I wasn't going to write about him anymore, but this is really about me. And how all shackles are off now. All I HAVE to do is enjoy and continue to have a relationship with my beloved firstborn. I feel like I'm 27 again. Anything's possible.
I leave you with this thought. He Thinks He'll Keep Her, indeed.
Well, let me restate that. I have paid the last dime I have to pay that benefits someone other than my child more than my child himself. Let me clarify a bit. Actually, since January I have been paying Big Bit directly, as I had stated my preference to do so starting with his birthday and EHFH actually said (via Big Bit, of course) that it was fine to start early. So, this year hasn't been too bad.
However, it was a really weird feeling to mail that check yesterday. I am not glad Big Bit is grown up, mind you. (at least not all the time, most of the time I'd like him to be 7 again, and his brother a newborn - they were so stinking cute and one didn't talk back and the other couldn't!) Whether a child lives with you full time or not, that sensation of leaving the nest is one that I think is universal. It's an odd feeling to know he's in charge of his decisions and consequences and as of mid-June, whether he goes to school any further or not.
Also, I do not dispute the obligation of a "non-custodial" (term makes me laugh, 'cause kids, there's been a whole lot of "custodial" duties I've continued to perform through the years, from dental visits, to braces, to immunizations, to haircuts - all fun for me, actually) parent to pay money to the other in order to benefit the child. My beef was more around the fact I far rather would have put it into a college fund, which would be approximately twice the size of the check that Big Bit's other parent has given to him for college. And yes, he could afford to do without the money. As did I - when Big Bit lived with us in Utah, every cent I received went straight to his college fund. He was amazed at how much I'd actually accumulated from that time alone.
It's a really liberating feeling to know that from now on, ANYTHING I do for Big Bit financially is because I want to, because we've discussed it, and because it makes perfect sense (hopefully, anyway). I think I feel a little at loose ends. Odd.
Money, and Big Bit, have been the things that have tied me to EHFH for 16 years longer than I wished to be. I know I wasn't going to write about him anymore, but this is really about me. And how all shackles are off now. All I HAVE to do is enjoy and continue to have a relationship with my beloved firstborn. I feel like I'm 27 again. Anything's possible.
I leave you with this thought. He Thinks He'll Keep Her, indeed.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Talk Thursday - Things That Must Go
I'm grateful to JulieAnn for this topic - I've wanted to write for a while, and haven't been able to or truly motivated to - for a variety of reasons. This one, though, resonated so much that I had to write.
My feelings about my time in Utah are fairly well known and documented, on this blog in particular. One thing I loved, though, was the "Radio From Hell" show. I miss Kerry, Bill and Gina.
They made me laugh out loud on the way to work with their dead on assessments of life in Utah. I also, to this day, use the term "asshat", which I quickly appropriated from Bill. I don't know why it made me laugh. But it did.
I don't know if this will lighten things up as much as JA would like - but here goes.
THINGS THAT MUST GO:
1) My thinking I can fix things for people.
2) People who run red lights.
3) Viking fans. (I would have said Bears fans, but I love my cousin, so no go.)
4) People who don't like Boise. That includes the CEO of a certain corporation that shall remain nameless. You don't have to want to live here, mind you, but just be okay with those of us that do.
5) Tea Party members who use racials slurs. Actually, pretty much anybody that uses racial slurs.
6) Things that keep preventing Jeff Gordon from winning a race. Seriously, people, it's getting ridiculous.
7) Rainy weather (at least for a while)!
8) The Denver Nuggets (the Jazz beat them last night and I believe will continue to do so).
9) Brent Fav-rah. 'Nuff said.
10) My worrying about stupid crap I can't control. Enough already. (See #1 above).
Those, in a nutshell, are things that MUST go. Oh, you're right, I have a list of 100 or so more. But that will do for a start.
My feelings about my time in Utah are fairly well known and documented, on this blog in particular. One thing I loved, though, was the "Radio From Hell" show. I miss Kerry, Bill and Gina.
They made me laugh out loud on the way to work with their dead on assessments of life in Utah. I also, to this day, use the term "asshat", which I quickly appropriated from Bill. I don't know why it made me laugh. But it did.
I don't know if this will lighten things up as much as JA would like - but here goes.
THINGS THAT MUST GO:
1) My thinking I can fix things for people.
2) People who run red lights.
3) Viking fans. (I would have said Bears fans, but I love my cousin, so no go.)
4) People who don't like Boise. That includes the CEO of a certain corporation that shall remain nameless. You don't have to want to live here, mind you, but just be okay with those of us that do.
5) Tea Party members who use racials slurs. Actually, pretty much anybody that uses racial slurs.
6) Things that keep preventing Jeff Gordon from winning a race. Seriously, people, it's getting ridiculous.
7) Rainy weather (at least for a while)!
8) The Denver Nuggets (the Jazz beat them last night and I believe will continue to do so).
9) Brent Fav-rah. 'Nuff said.
10) My worrying about stupid crap I can't control. Enough already. (See #1 above).
Those, in a nutshell, are things that MUST go. Oh, you're right, I have a list of 100 or so more. But that will do for a start.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Spring?
They keep saying it's spring. I don't believe it. It snowed here this week. No, it didn't stick BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT!
Bogus Basin ski area closes this weekend, and for once, I think the snow is better now than it has been a lot of the season. I guess we'll go skiing - but I really want warmth, sun and to be able to plant my garden.
Bogus Basin ski area closes this weekend, and for once, I think the snow is better now than it has been a lot of the season. I guess we'll go skiing - but I really want warmth, sun and to be able to plant my garden.
I have some better pictures of finches that I got today, but for now, this is the extent of my bird photos - every time I've tried to take their pictures, until yesterday, the damn things flew off.
Bucky got his paws on a squirrel Monday, but it put the afterburners on and escaped. Now there's a dead dove by our back door. Okay, cat, you've done enough damage to the animal kingdom this week, you can take a break.
In other news? I am way behind on my homework for my CEBS certification (but I'm catching up), Big Bit still hasn't chosen a school, but will be here next week and hopefully will do so.
We've booked a trip to celebrate Big Bit's graduation - we're going to Washington, D.C. Thankfully we had enough frequent flyer miles from years of travel and a merger between Northwest and Delta to get plane tickets. We are excited, I've been there for work but only got to visit the Mall area briefly, Big Bit went but there was a hurricane that week and he didn't get to do much, and Little Bit and TH have never been. So this should be fun.
The Green Bay Packers were kind enough to announce a pre-season game in Seattle in August. That will be our other extravagance - it's the only chance I have to watch them this year, so we're going.
Now, if it would just get warm enough to move about freely outside. I have cabin fever in the worst way.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Top 10 Things To Do In Boise
As promised to Kris aka @thewino on Twitter, I'm compiling my favorite things about Boise as a mini guide to her, should she be fortunate enough to visit my fair city.
1) The Greenbelt. Boise is a very fortunate city to have a beautiful parks system that runs on both sides (for the most part) of the Boise River. The Greenbelt is an amazing place to bike, walk, jog or lounge with a refreshing beverage. As long as the cops don't see you (if you're too close to the river, that is).
2)The Pen Not, not the one people are in NOW, the Old Pen. It's on Warm Springs Avenue. It sounds weird, but touring it is cool. It's got some really interesting architecture, and I always am amazed to be reminded that when it finally was "retired", I was, I think, 7 and my husband 10. It's not surprising that the reason we got a new prison is that the prisoners rioted at this one and burned a lot of it down. I can't blame them a bit. It's kind of out of the "Shawshank Redemption" except for there's no nice Morgan Freeman around.
3) The Boise Train Depot. The company I work for built this building many many years ago. (They also built the Hoover Dam). Looking at downtown Boise from the bell tower is amazing.
4) The Capitol Building. Our capitol is, I believe, one of the most beautiful in the 50 states. It's certainly a hell of a lot prettier than Nevada's, which is basically a rectangle of bricks with a teensy white dome on top. It's been recently remodeled and it's spectacular. Now if only there were more spectacular people in it.
5) The Idaho Shakespeare Festival, if visiting from June-September. Tom & Joe. The Fool Squad. They're amazing. That is all.
6) Table Rock. The brewpub or the hill, doesn't matter. The brewpub because that's where I met The Husband (and the beer is good, even if I'm no longer fond of their menu) and the hill because it's a great hike. One I obviously need to make more often, looking at myself in the mirror.
7) The MK Nature Center. Because you can see fish THIS BIG that you can't catch and they are laughing at you because of it. However, sometimes you get to see a mink catch one there and that is extremely satisfying for both mink and human. Sometimes you even see some of these guys.
8) The Crack. Get your minds out of the gutter. I'm referring to a piece of "art" that resides at the Grove Hotel. It's been the butt of jokes ever since it's unveiling, but we're all secretly fond of it. Here's how Boise Weekly describes it (much differently than Tom & Joe do, let me tell you):
BEST PUBLIC ART THAT GLOWS IN THE DARK Grove Street Illuminated & Boise Canal by Amy Westover-This is one of the better pieces of public art gracing our fair city. Created by one of Boise's own, it's just as intriguing during the day as it is at night. Westover masterfully combined style and substance to create an artwork that is aesthetically pleasing as well as historically illuminating. 9th and Front
9) The Museums (Art and Historical). They're right next to each other, (right by Table Rock brewpub, strangely enough) and I'm always happy to go see the two-headed calf, who's been there ever since I was a tot if not before and the art museum is fun - because believe it or not, we actually have art out here in the sticks!
10) Curtis Stigers. Well, you can't just go "see" Curtis. But he lives here. And I've seen him sing jazz and I've seen him eat croquetas at Bar Gernika. He's pretty cute eating croquetas. He's pretty cute any time, actually. My sons were appalled at my slack jawed gazing while sitting next to him. He was kind and ignored me. In addition to jazz, he also wrote the title song for the "Sons of Anarchy" series and had a huge pop hit back in the day. When he had long hair.
11) All things Basque. This would include Bar Gernika as referenced above (really a small restaurant, but there's definitely a bar there), Epi's Basque Restaurant (technically in Meridian, but that's worth a 15 minute drive, trust me, food is awesome and Chris, the owner, is the sweetest thing ever), the Basque Market and the Basque Museum.
Oops, that's 11 things. It's actually more like 20, since I kept throwing stuff in. Sorry, Kris, I've probably overwhelmed you. But I hope you get to come here and I hope you like it.
1) The Greenbelt. Boise is a very fortunate city to have a beautiful parks system that runs on both sides (for the most part) of the Boise River. The Greenbelt is an amazing place to bike, walk, jog or lounge with a refreshing beverage. As long as the cops don't see you (if you're too close to the river, that is).2)The Pen Not, not the one people are in NOW, the Old Pen. It's on Warm Springs Avenue. It sounds weird, but touring it is cool. It's got some really interesting architecture, and I always am amazed to be reminded that when it finally was "retired", I was, I think, 7 and my husband 10. It's not surprising that the reason we got a new prison is that the prisoners rioted at this one and burned a lot of it down. I can't blame them a bit. It's kind of out of the "Shawshank Redemption" except for there's no nice Morgan Freeman around.
3) The Boise Train Depot. The company I work for built this building many many years ago. (They also built the Hoover Dam). Looking at downtown Boise from the bell tower is amazing.
4) The Capitol Building. Our capitol is, I believe, one of the most beautiful in the 50 states. It's certainly a hell of a lot prettier than Nevada's, which is basically a rectangle of bricks with a teensy white dome on top. It's been recently remodeled and it's spectacular. Now if only there were more spectacular people in it.
5) The Idaho Shakespeare Festival, if visiting from June-September. Tom & Joe. The Fool Squad. They're amazing. That is all.
6) Table Rock. The brewpub or the hill, doesn't matter. The brewpub because that's where I met The Husband (and the beer is good, even if I'm no longer fond of their menu) and the hill because it's a great hike. One I obviously need to make more often, looking at myself in the mirror.
7) The MK Nature Center. Because you can see fish THIS BIG that you can't catch and they are laughing at you because of it. However, sometimes you get to see a mink catch one there and that is extremely satisfying for both mink and human. Sometimes you even see some of these guys.
8) The Crack. Get your minds out of the gutter. I'm referring to a piece of "art" that resides at the Grove Hotel. It's been the butt of jokes ever since it's unveiling, but we're all secretly fond of it. Here's how Boise Weekly describes it (much differently than Tom & Joe do, let me tell you):
BEST PUBLIC ART THAT GLOWS IN THE DARK Grove Street Illuminated & Boise Canal by Amy Westover-This is one of the better pieces of public art gracing our fair city. Created by one of Boise's own, it's just as intriguing during the day as it is at night. Westover masterfully combined style and substance to create an artwork that is aesthetically pleasing as well as historically illuminating. 9th and Front
9) The Museums (Art and Historical). They're right next to each other, (right by Table Rock brewpub, strangely enough) and I'm always happy to go see the two-headed calf, who's been there ever since I was a tot if not before and the art museum is fun - because believe it or not, we actually have art out here in the sticks!
10) Curtis Stigers. Well, you can't just go "see" Curtis. But he lives here. And I've seen him sing jazz and I've seen him eat croquetas at Bar Gernika. He's pretty cute eating croquetas. He's pretty cute any time, actually. My sons were appalled at my slack jawed gazing while sitting next to him. He was kind and ignored me. In addition to jazz, he also wrote the title song for the "Sons of Anarchy" series and had a huge pop hit back in the day. When he had long hair.
11) All things Basque. This would include Bar Gernika as referenced above (really a small restaurant, but there's definitely a bar there), Epi's Basque Restaurant (technically in Meridian, but that's worth a 15 minute drive, trust me, food is awesome and Chris, the owner, is the sweetest thing ever), the Basque Market and the Basque Museum.
Oops, that's 11 things. It's actually more like 20, since I kept throwing stuff in. Sorry, Kris, I've probably overwhelmed you. But I hope you get to come here and I hope you like it.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Epic Fail, and other updates
I have been a total sloth in my posting. I haven't "Talk Thursday"d, I haven't randomly rambled, I haven't done anything.
But, I have news to report. Today, my firstborn got an acceptance letter from the College of Idaho, the fine establishment I attended for only a semester, then was stupid enough to leave. And a scholarship. A good one. Not a great one, but one that levels the playing field with his other two options. Which means he really has OPTIONS. (Oh, and a much better one than I got when I went there.) Yeah!
And, I must admit, listening to him talk, I was suddenly sixteen again, looking at a letter and reading the words "The College of Idaho is pleased to inform you you've been accepted for admission as a freshment for the fall of 1983 semester". Or something along those lines. And knowing, suddenly, that you have a future. And options.
Folks, it's a great feeling. For both of us.
Now to see what he ends up getting from everyone. I may end up disappointed from my own selfish perspective. But I think he got some idea of what you can accomplish in life if you take college seriously. More seriously than I did, for sure.
Isn't it great, parents, when you get that just blissfully happy feeling for your children?
But, I have news to report. Today, my firstborn got an acceptance letter from the College of Idaho, the fine establishment I attended for only a semester, then was stupid enough to leave. And a scholarship. A good one. Not a great one, but one that levels the playing field with his other two options. Which means he really has OPTIONS. (Oh, and a much better one than I got when I went there.) Yeah!
And, I must admit, listening to him talk, I was suddenly sixteen again, looking at a letter and reading the words "The College of Idaho is pleased to inform you you've been accepted for admission as a freshment for the fall of 1983 semester". Or something along those lines. And knowing, suddenly, that you have a future. And options.
Folks, it's a great feeling. For both of us.
Now to see what he ends up getting from everyone. I may end up disappointed from my own selfish perspective. But I think he got some idea of what you can accomplish in life if you take college seriously. More seriously than I did, for sure.
Isn't it great, parents, when you get that just blissfully happy feeling for your children?
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Just a Thought
I had a post about forgiveness and how I would be working on that. I am not posting this update to mention He Who Must Not Be Named, but rather to note the following: I can't believe a parent would be so short-sighted, stupid and uncaring of said child so as to refuse to fill out the FAFSA.
Rather than do my usual mother-bear imitation and engage in a fight with said HWMNBN, thinking that somehow I could change behaviors and "win", thus perpetuating the whole hatred thing mentioned before, I realized this was the desired reaction, didn't engage, called various schools and found out that I could indeed complete it, so I did that...problem solved, I hope.
And instead of anger, I felt pity that someone could be that selfish and short-sighted. That's progress.
Hopefully that's the last of those little encounters.
Rather than do my usual mother-bear imitation and engage in a fight with said HWMNBN, thinking that somehow I could change behaviors and "win", thus perpetuating the whole hatred thing mentioned before, I realized this was the desired reaction, didn't engage, called various schools and found out that I could indeed complete it, so I did that...problem solved, I hope.
And instead of anger, I felt pity that someone could be that selfish and short-sighted. That's progress.
Hopefully that's the last of those little encounters.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
The Out of Towners
We haven't really been out of town for a while, for more than a day trip anyway. Gosh, I think the last time we really went anywhere is when we were in Oregon last summer!
Well, much as I love Idaho, and as contented as I was to be homebound for quite a while, once I settle in, I have to escape the environs, if you will, and go somewhere quite different.
Thankfully before I did our taxes I planned a trip. (Mr. President, I do support you, but do you have to pay for the stimulus on my back alone, I ask you? J/K but it feels that way this year.)
For years, TH and I have talked about going to a NASCAR race. For years, we have not done so. Then, while in Reno last May, some friends who go every year mentioned that they had slashed ticket prices due to the economy.
Ah, NASCAR. I get weird looks for liking it - my boss said somewhat timidly this morning, "Oh, is that a sport?" Here's the thing, kids. It's damn hard to drive a car on a banked track at 150 plus miles per hour. I have been 125 on a straightaway in my Camaro (Mom, please ignore most of this paragraph) and that is much, much different, but it gives you a slight idea of how fast things could go wrong. And yes, you can like NASCAR and be college educated, somewhat liberal in your politics, have Jane Austen as one of your favorite authors and know who Yo-Yo Ma is. So there.
So, we started nosing around. Packages are way expensive, but I'm a do-it-yourself kind of gal and found that with one plane ticket for free, booking a hotel room through Hotwire (and, we ended up at the Stratosphere, which really isn't bad) and finding a company that didn't ask for your right kidney to shuttle you to the racetrack and back we could do it fairly inexpensively.
We're flying down Saturday, back Monday night. Our only splurge on the trip (since the rest of it is now paid for) is dinner at this place on Saturday. I was thinking of a show, but then my new Packer blog buddy Jersey Al told me how much it was (I was close, but not enough) and I went "never mind"! It will be fun though. We really didn't go anywhere for our wedding anniversary in December so this is in place of a big dinner then.
Ella's a little bigger now, but her daddy's just as handsome. Go Jeff Gordon!
Well, much as I love Idaho, and as contented as I was to be homebound for quite a while, once I settle in, I have to escape the environs, if you will, and go somewhere quite different.
Thankfully before I did our taxes I planned a trip. (Mr. President, I do support you, but do you have to pay for the stimulus on my back alone, I ask you? J/K but it feels that way this year.)
For years, TH and I have talked about going to a NASCAR race. For years, we have not done so. Then, while in Reno last May, some friends who go every year mentioned that they had slashed ticket prices due to the economy.
Ah, NASCAR. I get weird looks for liking it - my boss said somewhat timidly this morning, "Oh, is that a sport?" Here's the thing, kids. It's damn hard to drive a car on a banked track at 150 plus miles per hour. I have been 125 on a straightaway in my Camaro (Mom, please ignore most of this paragraph) and that is much, much different, but it gives you a slight idea of how fast things could go wrong. And yes, you can like NASCAR and be college educated, somewhat liberal in your politics, have Jane Austen as one of your favorite authors and know who Yo-Yo Ma is. So there.
So, we started nosing around. Packages are way expensive, but I'm a do-it-yourself kind of gal and found that with one plane ticket for free, booking a hotel room through Hotwire (and, we ended up at the Stratosphere, which really isn't bad) and finding a company that didn't ask for your right kidney to shuttle you to the racetrack and back we could do it fairly inexpensively.
We're flying down Saturday, back Monday night. Our only splurge on the trip (since the rest of it is now paid for) is dinner at this place on Saturday. I was thinking of a show, but then my new Packer blog buddy Jersey Al told me how much it was (I was close, but not enough) and I went "never mind"! It will be fun though. We really didn't go anywhere for our wedding anniversary in December so this is in place of a big dinner then.
Then Sunday - the race! While our friends from Reno are unfortunately not going this year, my friend Renee (the Mom of our longtime babysitter now bride S), her husband, and a bunch of their friends, some of whom we know and love are going. They park their RVs there - in fact, I'd like to bet they are already ensconced at the track since time trials have started. We'll hook up with them Sunday and if our seats totally suck and it's cold/rainy (yes, it's supposed to rain Saturday at least in Vegas), I'm hanging out with Renee in the RV and having a beer.
My hope, of course, is that I will see this handsome pair in the winner's circle at the end:
Ella's a little bigger now, but her daddy's just as handsome. Go Jeff Gordon!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
A Wonderful Life
I know I've not been a fountain of optimism on this blog lately. Well, you're going to have to put up with one more dose of negativity, and Lord knows I hope it's the last for a while.
TH got up this morning to make lattes, as he always does, and much to our dismay found our beloved dog, Margarita, had died during the night. She was 11, would have been 12 in April, and yes, for a Labrador, that's on the upper end of the scale. She had arthritis in her hips pretty badly, but other than that and a general slowing of her activity level, she was in fairly good health. She'd just come through her last checkup in January with good results beyond her known mostly old-age related issues.
She was the biggest pain in the ass as a puppy you could think of. The first thing she did when my Mom brought her in our house at 2 months was poop and pee on the kitchen floor. I was about 3-4 months pregnant. You can imagine my joy in having to take care of a puppy when I was exhausted. But of course she was so stinking cute and we grew to love her in spite of (sometimes because of) her sometimes Marley-esque activities.
As she matured, she became a sweet and lovely dog. She loved people, her family, especially her boys (Big Bit in particular), she listened, she didn't dig or chew and she was very intelligent. Last summer she actually caught a squirrel (quite by accident I think) and you would have thought she was a pup again, she was so proud of herself. She was loyal, bossy (she would snatch her sister's stuffed animals when she walked in the door).
Her mother, who some friends owned, died at the same age she was now, I think, and had far more health problems for far longer than our pooch. She didn't have a prolonged illness and I hope didn't suffer at all, or if so only very briefly. So I know she was lucky in that respect. But, damn it, we're going to miss her.
And yesterday was National Margarita Day. I kid you not.
Love you, Pookums.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Talk Thursday - Spin
I haven't blogged much lately - I would say I don't know why, but I do know. For years I've been preaching to myself "simplify" because my world seems to be in a perpetual spin. There is something of an ebb and flow to this, but for the most part, I feel like I'm on a merry-go-round and can't get off.
First of all, of course, there's work. The job's not terribly difficult, most days, and I've made some emotional adjustments so I can handle it better, but I struggle between thinking I should work a regular 8-5 schedule (for the most part) and the flexible schedule I'm currently on. It sounds great - every other Monday off - but the extra time I'm at work in the other days seems to throw me off. If I could just get up in the morning, I could get to work earlier and I'm sure the days wouldn't seem so long.
Then, there's life! TH is in Portland this week for work - may I mention how much better things worked for me when I was the one that traveled for work? Little Bit has been pretty good, but he likes to trot out his rebelliousness at the moment it's least needed - when getting ready for school, church, etc.
I've taken up piano since Christmas - TH gave me a lovely keyboard. I've always wanted to play, and enjoying lessons with friend Allen, but it's another thing I have to do everyday.
I've also been doing the Wii Fit the last few weeks - at least 30 minutes 5 times a week. Yet again, another thing I have to do.
That doesn't include laundry, shopping and all that stuff that just has to be done.
I haven't blogged, haven't really read blogs, haven't e-mailed Psam back and she probably thinks she pissed me off (she didn't, she has really good insight like her Mom), I have just run on the treadmill.
For Lent, you have to give something up (well, you don't in my church, but being more thoughtful about your life and relationship to God is strongly encouraged). I'm giving up The Spin. What does that mean exactly? I have 40 days to figure it out. I'll keep you posted.
First of all, of course, there's work. The job's not terribly difficult, most days, and I've made some emotional adjustments so I can handle it better, but I struggle between thinking I should work a regular 8-5 schedule (for the most part) and the flexible schedule I'm currently on. It sounds great - every other Monday off - but the extra time I'm at work in the other days seems to throw me off. If I could just get up in the morning, I could get to work earlier and I'm sure the days wouldn't seem so long.
Then, there's life! TH is in Portland this week for work - may I mention how much better things worked for me when I was the one that traveled for work? Little Bit has been pretty good, but he likes to trot out his rebelliousness at the moment it's least needed - when getting ready for school, church, etc.
I've taken up piano since Christmas - TH gave me a lovely keyboard. I've always wanted to play, and enjoying lessons with friend Allen, but it's another thing I have to do everyday.
I've also been doing the Wii Fit the last few weeks - at least 30 minutes 5 times a week. Yet again, another thing I have to do.
That doesn't include laundry, shopping and all that stuff that just has to be done.
I haven't blogged, haven't really read blogs, haven't e-mailed Psam back and she probably thinks she pissed me off (she didn't, she has really good insight like her Mom), I have just run on the treadmill.
For Lent, you have to give something up (well, you don't in my church, but being more thoughtful about your life and relationship to God is strongly encouraged). I'm giving up The Spin. What does that mean exactly? I have 40 days to figure it out. I'll keep you posted.
Friday, February 5, 2010
I Think About You
It's gone so fast...from this:
To this:
"When I look at this world, I think about you...eight years old, big blue eyes and a heart of gold"... - Collin Raye.
Happy Birthday, my adult. Sigh.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
On A Lighter Note
Okay, there has been way too much doom, gloom and introspection on this particular part of teh interwebs lately.
Today, because I'm sure I'm not moving, and I think I'll have a job for at least three more years because that's when the lease on our office space runs out (I'm not kidding, that's my cynical self talking but it's usually not far wrong), I sprung for a toy for myself.
"Sprung" is an operative word, mind, because I got it for $9.99. But, my Crackberry habit is re-established as of Friday. World beware.
The last time I had one of these addictive toys, my job paid for it. I wanted one, and my job required it, but I had no idea how fast I would become a fan of this small device. TH and The Bits were not such big fans, particularly the time I had a "screaming" argument via e-mail with the Co-CEO of the LLC we worked for in Utah. Because, you see, I was standing in line at Disneyland. That's when they decided I'd had enough. Everytime I picked it up when off work from then on, I had one to three sets of eyes looking darkly in my direction.
When I got the job in Idaho, I thought I would get a Palm as part of my new job, everyone at my level or above has one. However, my boss, in a misguided bout of either economy or enforcing work/life balance, said "Oh, you don't need one". I underwent at least three months of serious withdrawal. I had to pay attention even in boring meetings. I couldn't keep abreast of Jazz scores at my convenience (I fondly remember tracking the playoffs in Singapore and updating my co-workers on how it was going - we were all avid fans). I couldn't have someone call me to get me out of a boring meeting. I couldn't make scathing comments about someone right in front of them (yes, sad to say, I did that sometimes in Utah. But Sybil deserved it).
We have had some need over the last several months at times for at least a web connection. We got TH a data package, but he has an old RAZR and it is pretty sub par at best. So, today I orderded my new baby:
Today, because I'm sure I'm not moving, and I think I'll have a job for at least three more years because that's when the lease on our office space runs out (I'm not kidding, that's my cynical self talking but it's usually not far wrong), I sprung for a toy for myself.
"Sprung" is an operative word, mind, because I got it for $9.99. But, my Crackberry habit is re-established as of Friday. World beware.
The last time I had one of these addictive toys, my job paid for it. I wanted one, and my job required it, but I had no idea how fast I would become a fan of this small device. TH and The Bits were not such big fans, particularly the time I had a "screaming" argument via e-mail with the Co-CEO of the LLC we worked for in Utah. Because, you see, I was standing in line at Disneyland. That's when they decided I'd had enough. Everytime I picked it up when off work from then on, I had one to three sets of eyes looking darkly in my direction.
When I got the job in Idaho, I thought I would get a Palm as part of my new job, everyone at my level or above has one. However, my boss, in a misguided bout of either economy or enforcing work/life balance, said "Oh, you don't need one". I underwent at least three months of serious withdrawal. I had to pay attention even in boring meetings. I couldn't keep abreast of Jazz scores at my convenience (I fondly remember tracking the playoffs in Singapore and updating my co-workers on how it was going - we were all avid fans). I couldn't have someone call me to get me out of a boring meeting. I couldn't make scathing comments about someone right in front of them (yes, sad to say, I did that sometimes in Utah. But Sybil deserved it).
We have had some need over the last several months at times for at least a web connection. We got TH a data package, but he has an old RAZR and it is pretty sub par at best. So, today I orderded my new baby:
I know, it's shallow to get pleasure out of material things. But a lot of my work clothes are from Fred Meyer and until lately I got my hair cut at SuperCuts. So it's not like I'm throwing money down the sink all the time.
And, TH wanted me to get it. Oh, ye of short-term memory loss.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Talk Thursday - Long Time Gone
"You're a long time gone...keepin' your secrets for too long. Baby, you ain't half of what you used to be....in this dim October sky, I've got no tears left to cry...And I'm finally learning you can't be too strong....I'm a long time gone" - Gin Blossoms, Long Time Gone.
Well, since it's my topic...I'd better write on it.
I went to church Sunday, as I do most Sundays (not all, sadly, in the winter I am a sloth who has trouble rising before 9 when the sun comes up unless it involves going somewhere warm or getting paid to show up to work). As one of the ladies I work with says, I don't go to church so much because I think I have to in order to keep my faith, but I'd hate to see what kind of person I'd be if I didn't go. She said that about her, not me. I think.
I had already sent out the topic, and had some idea of what I would write about. But then it was the Women's service at the church as happens once a year. Yeah, you'd think I'd know that. But I'm not terribly involved other than showing up, worshiping and giving money. Lutherans aren't the most friendly bunch in the world, and while I really like our Pastor, who's in his early 30s and, for a Pastor, fairly liberal in his ideas, I don't fit in with his "group" who are about his age, and I don't fit in with the older people, (i.e. anyone 10 years older than me) because they just seem very comfortable with each other, and despite the fact they've seen my mug on and off for 15 years, they don't seem to interested in pursuing a conversation, and as I've mentioned before I'm shy. (note to Kristi - when Shane has a church, make darned sure you go talk to that nice lady in her early 40's who's standing off to the side and isn't quite sure how to proceed. She'll love you for it).
So, anyhoo, there I am in church, led by the ladies, and very nicely, too. Then the woman who was doing the sermon got up. And, kids, she rocked my world. I'm not quite sure what to make of it. I thought I knew at first, but now I'm not sure how to pull it off.
What I've taken from my experiences a "Long Time Gone" is that you can do something with the best of intentions and be brutally, totally, and completely punished for it. Due to my not being the primary custodial parent the majority of the time since Big Bit started school, I've had everything from people who broke off conversations upon finding out my situation to "family" members saying (though not to my face, of course) that I was probably unfit or at the very least an extremely poor mother for not being in the same town as my child. (Please note, one of these family member should be investigated by Child Protective Services, and I'm not the only person who thinks that. So I thought she had a lot of nerve. No, she doesn't read this, so it's not any of you). I had someone tell me when I announced I was pregnant "Oh (bleep)". I took this as an assumption that I would not be able to keep custody or raise a second child effectively.
In fact, I will note for the historical record, there has never been any allegation I'm unfit. I just had the cojones to stand up for myself, and to some guys, that is enough of a crime.
I knew my truth, why I did make certain decisions and not others. Certain decisions were made by "independent" third parties who at the end of the day didn't seem independent at all. I've made my peace with that part of it, as it were. I don't claim to be without blame. I have plenty and I take responsibility. But I can't stand to even hear EHFH's voice anymore.
The woman, who had also been through a bad divorce, though one with different parameters than mine, said that you have to forgive. Not for the other person, but for yourself. I've heard this before, in other times and places, but this time it really hit me. Whether you believe in Christianity or you think it's bunk, this is a precept that does make a lot of sense.
You see, Friday is Big Bit's 18th birthday. I've been going through this crap for SIXTEEN YEARS. Let me repeat: SIXTEEN years. And while when I got divorced I had no hard feelings as such towards EHFH, he has made it his mission over the last SIXTEEN years to make my life a living hell whenever possible. His actions have pretty much made what affection remained morph into something pretty close to hatred. And while he hasn't always succeeded in his quest, he's succeeded enough to make me more than regret giving him that power. If you add in our married and divorced time, it's coming up on 25 years. That's a lifetime.
So I resolve to forgive on Sunday night. And I'm feeling very "Christlike in my love and forgiveness" to paraphrase the Church (not my Church but "the one true Church"). Then Big Bit calls me last night to talk to me about his FAFSA that has to be filed so he can get qualified for his scholarships, private grants, etc. He and his father are yelling at each other. Not screaming, but yelling pretty loud. I flashback to being afraid, with a two year old in a diaper in my arms, backing up towards a refrigerator, with a very enraged man in my face. I tell Big Bit that I have to get off the phone.
"Call me when you're done". I know it's not serious, honestly. I know they're just both mad, not violent in any way. Big Bit is 6 foot tall and at least 185 lbs. But it gives me the heebie jeebies.
Then, when Big Bit calls back, and I explain that I couldn't stay on the phone because it was creeping me out, he has the raw nerve to say "You aren't good with confrontation".
Oh, I'm good with confrontation, son. I held you in my arms ready to defend you to the end with your dad screaming in our faces. I'm glad you don't remember. I confronted 12 hours of labor only to go through major surgery to have you. And I'm glad I did. I bought my lawyer a freakin' Corvette to try and keep you with me. I'm just not good with screaming.
It's obviously hard to forgive. But it's a long time gone, and I'm tired of secrets. And yelling. It is time to forgive. Wish me good luck, I'm going to need it.
Other than posting pics of Big Bit's graduation which may include pictures of him, this is the last time I will mention that man, forgiveness or no. It's time for that as well.
Well, since it's my topic...I'd better write on it.
I went to church Sunday, as I do most Sundays (not all, sadly, in the winter I am a sloth who has trouble rising before 9 when the sun comes up unless it involves going somewhere warm or getting paid to show up to work). As one of the ladies I work with says, I don't go to church so much because I think I have to in order to keep my faith, but I'd hate to see what kind of person I'd be if I didn't go. She said that about her, not me. I think.
I had already sent out the topic, and had some idea of what I would write about. But then it was the Women's service at the church as happens once a year. Yeah, you'd think I'd know that. But I'm not terribly involved other than showing up, worshiping and giving money. Lutherans aren't the most friendly bunch in the world, and while I really like our Pastor, who's in his early 30s and, for a Pastor, fairly liberal in his ideas, I don't fit in with his "group" who are about his age, and I don't fit in with the older people, (i.e. anyone 10 years older than me) because they just seem very comfortable with each other, and despite the fact they've seen my mug on and off for 15 years, they don't seem to interested in pursuing a conversation, and as I've mentioned before I'm shy. (note to Kristi - when Shane has a church, make darned sure you go talk to that nice lady in her early 40's who's standing off to the side and isn't quite sure how to proceed. She'll love you for it).
So, anyhoo, there I am in church, led by the ladies, and very nicely, too. Then the woman who was doing the sermon got up. And, kids, she rocked my world. I'm not quite sure what to make of it. I thought I knew at first, but now I'm not sure how to pull it off.
What I've taken from my experiences a "Long Time Gone" is that you can do something with the best of intentions and be brutally, totally, and completely punished for it. Due to my not being the primary custodial parent the majority of the time since Big Bit started school, I've had everything from people who broke off conversations upon finding out my situation to "family" members saying (though not to my face, of course) that I was probably unfit or at the very least an extremely poor mother for not being in the same town as my child. (Please note, one of these family member should be investigated by Child Protective Services, and I'm not the only person who thinks that. So I thought she had a lot of nerve. No, she doesn't read this, so it's not any of you). I had someone tell me when I announced I was pregnant "Oh (bleep)". I took this as an assumption that I would not be able to keep custody or raise a second child effectively.
In fact, I will note for the historical record, there has never been any allegation I'm unfit. I just had the cojones to stand up for myself, and to some guys, that is enough of a crime.
I knew my truth, why I did make certain decisions and not others. Certain decisions were made by "independent" third parties who at the end of the day didn't seem independent at all. I've made my peace with that part of it, as it were. I don't claim to be without blame. I have plenty and I take responsibility. But I can't stand to even hear EHFH's voice anymore.
The woman, who had also been through a bad divorce, though one with different parameters than mine, said that you have to forgive. Not for the other person, but for yourself. I've heard this before, in other times and places, but this time it really hit me. Whether you believe in Christianity or you think it's bunk, this is a precept that does make a lot of sense.
You see, Friday is Big Bit's 18th birthday. I've been going through this crap for SIXTEEN YEARS. Let me repeat: SIXTEEN years. And while when I got divorced I had no hard feelings as such towards EHFH, he has made it his mission over the last SIXTEEN years to make my life a living hell whenever possible. His actions have pretty much made what affection remained morph into something pretty close to hatred. And while he hasn't always succeeded in his quest, he's succeeded enough to make me more than regret giving him that power. If you add in our married and divorced time, it's coming up on 25 years. That's a lifetime.
So I resolve to forgive on Sunday night. And I'm feeling very "Christlike in my love and forgiveness" to paraphrase the Church (not my Church but "the one true Church"). Then Big Bit calls me last night to talk to me about his FAFSA that has to be filed so he can get qualified for his scholarships, private grants, etc. He and his father are yelling at each other. Not screaming, but yelling pretty loud. I flashback to being afraid, with a two year old in a diaper in my arms, backing up towards a refrigerator, with a very enraged man in my face. I tell Big Bit that I have to get off the phone.
"Call me when you're done". I know it's not serious, honestly. I know they're just both mad, not violent in any way. Big Bit is 6 foot tall and at least 185 lbs. But it gives me the heebie jeebies.
Then, when Big Bit calls back, and I explain that I couldn't stay on the phone because it was creeping me out, he has the raw nerve to say "You aren't good with confrontation".
Oh, I'm good with confrontation, son. I held you in my arms ready to defend you to the end with your dad screaming in our faces. I'm glad you don't remember. I confronted 12 hours of labor only to go through major surgery to have you. And I'm glad I did. I bought my lawyer a freakin' Corvette to try and keep you with me. I'm just not good with screaming.
It's obviously hard to forgive. But it's a long time gone, and I'm tired of secrets. And yelling. It is time to forgive. Wish me good luck, I'm going to need it.
Other than posting pics of Big Bit's graduation which may include pictures of him, this is the last time I will mention that man, forgiveness or no. It's time for that as well.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Be Careful What You Wish For
Well, the good news is I probably won't be asked to move. That makes me very happy.
The bad news? We got the news that certain programs I am associated with are going out to bid. Without really any forewarning or consulting with any of us. The person who should have called to discuss this didn't- who is a much higher authority than any I work with, in Boise period - had their consultant do that. I will not say what I would like to call these people but it isn't pleasant.
The meaning of all this? Well, let's just say ultimately I'm not thinking it's job security for me and those I work with. In the short-term I think things are fine. Not sure long-term and I like to have people treat me and mine with the respect all humans deserve. Even Brett Favre.
I'm not sorry we left Utah. I'm really not. And while it's been a hard adjustment work-wise, I am starting to appreciate the people I work with for what they bring to the table. I just would like to have a job - even a "job" that would have your ordinary amount of politics, stress and heartache instead of doubt, fear and some loathing. I used to have it, so I know it's possible.
Sigh. Guess it's back to the salt mines.
And I have to come up with a Talk Thursday topic. I warn you, it may be a depressing one.
The bad news? We got the news that certain programs I am associated with are going out to bid. Without really any forewarning or consulting with any of us. The person who should have called to discuss this didn't- who is a much higher authority than any I work with, in Boise period - had their consultant do that. I will not say what I would like to call these people but it isn't pleasant.
The meaning of all this? Well, let's just say ultimately I'm not thinking it's job security for me and those I work with. In the short-term I think things are fine. Not sure long-term and I like to have people treat me and mine with the respect all humans deserve. Even Brett Favre.
I'm not sorry we left Utah. I'm really not. And while it's been a hard adjustment work-wise, I am starting to appreciate the people I work with for what they bring to the table. I just would like to have a job - even a "job" that would have your ordinary amount of politics, stress and heartache instead of doubt, fear and some loathing. I used to have it, so I know it's possible.
Sigh. Guess it's back to the salt mines.
And I have to come up with a Talk Thursday topic. I warn you, it may be a depressing one.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
You Get What You Get
It's a song we've been playing on Rock Band. But it resonates very much tonight.
Hey, James (and the rest of the Viking fans) - how does it feel? Sucky, doesn't it?
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Kicks
It's been a long couple of weeks, dear readers. TH is doing well with his face, he can smile and everything, but his "job" has proven to be somewhat rocky (not in the sense of having one, but in the clarity of what having one means) as has mine. Anyone who lives in the greater Boise area may have heard my illustrious employer is moving their divisional headquarters (um, where I work) to Denver.
No, I'm not moving to Denver. I like Denver, lots, but I came home to be home. No, I don't know that this means I have to move to Denver. Or would need to in order to keep my job.
But, I will say, any stupid guy from Australia who happens to be a CEO with a location in Boise who doesn't LIKE Boise, thus feeling the need to change things doesn't have his head on straight.
That's all I'm saying, other than I really don't think things are as drastic as the local media painted them and I knew coming in that the worst could happen, but I wanted to come home. I do not want to be Dooced. So if you want to ask where I work, ask via e-mail.
So, because I needed some stability today, I found this video. Paul Revere and the Raiders have been an essential part of my life. My parents went to see them at the Armory in Twin Falls when they were dating. I was lucky enough to dance at Mr. Revere's club he had in Reno when EHFH and I were married and see him play, but got to meet him later when he played in the casino town in which my Mother was the Postmaster.
I relate the following simply because I'm sure he wanted to kill me. I paraphrase, but only a little.
Paul Revere (PR): Hey, how are you?
Me: Fine, it's very nice to meet you.
PR: Are you from around here? (or it may have been, how does a whippersnapper like you know who I am?)
Me: Yes. I grew up in Twin Falls. My parents used to go dance to your music when they were dating!
PR: Wow. Thanks.
(Me: Didn't get I just made him feel 100 years old. I got it later, um a few hours later, and I wanted to kick myself, because he really is a nice guy).
I now present to you two of the hottest guys who made it out of the state of Idaho - Mark Lindsay and Paul Revere. And these other guys that I think are from Idaho but I can't be firmly sure on that.
And yes, this all reminds me of "That Thing You Do". I think Mark is the guy who they say "sorry girls, he's engaged!" He just has that look about him, doesn't he?
No, I'm not moving to Denver. I like Denver, lots, but I came home to be home. No, I don't know that this means I have to move to Denver. Or would need to in order to keep my job.
But, I will say, any stupid guy from Australia who happens to be a CEO with a location in Boise who doesn't LIKE Boise, thus feeling the need to change things doesn't have his head on straight.
That's all I'm saying, other than I really don't think things are as drastic as the local media painted them and I knew coming in that the worst could happen, but I wanted to come home. I do not want to be Dooced. So if you want to ask where I work, ask via e-mail.
So, because I needed some stability today, I found this video. Paul Revere and the Raiders have been an essential part of my life. My parents went to see them at the Armory in Twin Falls when they were dating. I was lucky enough to dance at Mr. Revere's club he had in Reno when EHFH and I were married and see him play, but got to meet him later when he played in the casino town in which my Mother was the Postmaster.
I relate the following simply because I'm sure he wanted to kill me. I paraphrase, but only a little.
Paul Revere (PR): Hey, how are you?
Me: Fine, it's very nice to meet you.
PR: Are you from around here? (or it may have been, how does a whippersnapper like you know who I am?)
Me: Yes. I grew up in Twin Falls. My parents used to go dance to your music when they were dating!
PR: Wow. Thanks.
(Me: Didn't get I just made him feel 100 years old. I got it later, um a few hours later, and I wanted to kick myself, because he really is a nice guy).
I now present to you two of the hottest guys who made it out of the state of Idaho - Mark Lindsay and Paul Revere. And these other guys that I think are from Idaho but I can't be firmly sure on that.
And yes, this all reminds me of "That Thing You Do". I think Mark is the guy who they say "sorry girls, he's engaged!" He just has that look about him, doesn't he?
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Talk Thursday - My My Time Flies
I have been a horrible Talk Thursday participant - sorry Cele! But I will try to be better.
I haven't posted - after the documented upheaval I really just decompressed. New Year's Eve we were supposed to go to either friend Dana's or friend Rhonda's, but it started to snow around 5 p.m. and mix in slick roads, the intent to have a few drinks and the fact that it's "amateur night" so I really hate to go out in crowds anymore...we stayed home.
It was our 15th wedding anniversary...time does fly. I don't know why this one hit home more to me than number 14...but it really did. I've spent 1/3 of my life married to TH, far more than I was with EHFH. And, I still like him. (Yes, there are days but that's how it works).
It seems yesterday I was a somewhat wounded 27 year old, pretty sure that marriage wasn't for me, my son was going to be an only child because his first two years had been the hardest of my life (and I was starting to wonder how anyone's marriage withstood having children, even a planned one as Big Bit was) and my intent from then on was to date different guys, have lots of friends and an active social life and, in short, live a very different life than that I had to that point. The sole exception to this (other than the rest of my family) was Big Bit. He I really had committed to for life and that wasn't going anywhere, not that I wanted it to.
So, there I was, 1994, first week in Boise, had a boyfriend I was dating prior to moving (no, I didn't move here for him, which could be a book in itself) and through him a roommate who turned out to be complicated but for the time being was a lot of fun to hang out with, made the lots of friends. On this night I was on the town with my cousin, and who did I meet but...yep. TH.
I had been divorced, I think, a little over a month. Yeah, I know. I really do know and I know what I would have said to someone who was in the same situation. "You idiot!"
It didn't start off like that. I didn't hear from him for well over a week and a half. And in fact when he called I didn't know who he was. *Cough* No, it's not that bad but I have a short memory.
Suffice it to say six months, a whole lotta drama later, more than one meeting with Big Bit and lots of discussion and soul searching on both our parts, we got married. 12/31/94. And I will never, never be sorry we did. Not only do I still love him, but I have my second Bit. And I treasure him beyond measure, as I do with the first.
And while I do have friends and something of a social life, it's not anything like I envisioned when I moved to Boise. And that is just fine with me.
I love you TH. Time does fly.
I haven't posted - after the documented upheaval I really just decompressed. New Year's Eve we were supposed to go to either friend Dana's or friend Rhonda's, but it started to snow around 5 p.m. and mix in slick roads, the intent to have a few drinks and the fact that it's "amateur night" so I really hate to go out in crowds anymore...we stayed home.
It was our 15th wedding anniversary...time does fly. I don't know why this one hit home more to me than number 14...but it really did. I've spent 1/3 of my life married to TH, far more than I was with EHFH. And, I still like him. (Yes, there are days but that's how it works).
It seems yesterday I was a somewhat wounded 27 year old, pretty sure that marriage wasn't for me, my son was going to be an only child because his first two years had been the hardest of my life (and I was starting to wonder how anyone's marriage withstood having children, even a planned one as Big Bit was) and my intent from then on was to date different guys, have lots of friends and an active social life and, in short, live a very different life than that I had to that point. The sole exception to this (other than the rest of my family) was Big Bit. He I really had committed to for life and that wasn't going anywhere, not that I wanted it to.
So, there I was, 1994, first week in Boise, had a boyfriend I was dating prior to moving (no, I didn't move here for him, which could be a book in itself) and through him a roommate who turned out to be complicated but for the time being was a lot of fun to hang out with, made the lots of friends. On this night I was on the town with my cousin, and who did I meet but...yep. TH.
I had been divorced, I think, a little over a month. Yeah, I know. I really do know and I know what I would have said to someone who was in the same situation. "You idiot!"
It didn't start off like that. I didn't hear from him for well over a week and a half. And in fact when he called I didn't know who he was. *Cough* No, it's not that bad but I have a short memory.
Suffice it to say six months, a whole lotta drama later, more than one meeting with Big Bit and lots of discussion and soul searching on both our parts, we got married. 12/31/94. And I will never, never be sorry we did. Not only do I still love him, but I have my second Bit. And I treasure him beyond measure, as I do with the first.
And while I do have friends and something of a social life, it's not anything like I envisioned when I moved to Boise. And that is just fine with me.
I love you TH. Time does fly.
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